Memoirs Of A Romantic

The Difference Is..

2011-08-04T21:52:00.002+08:00

I've been watching alot of Discovery and Nat Geo recently. The wonders of high definition television today. Have you seen a lion going for the kill stride on a wilderbeast? In.. Slow.. Motion? Epic shit.

Wildlife experts tell you all the time, that an animal would only attack a human being in situations where it feels threatened, or where his territory is trespassed.

So does that mean, that rational human beings should attack another in the exact same situation? To a certain extent, I find it completely justified. What I can't stand is personal attacks on grounds of personal insecurities.

Its a month of great rewards this Ramadhan is. Namecalling and anger should be kept at an absolute minimum. Allah opened the floodgates to pahala. At your fingertips. I'm trying to make the best of this month as I possibly can.

I live my life pretty simple I must say. I don't bug people. I do what I want, trying not to step on any toes in the process.

Lets just hope that the trash you're talking won't be the ball and chain that drags you down to hell. I have plenty of other sins I have to worry about. The least I can do is not talk bad about others, and save them for my thoughts.

The difference between us and animals, is that we could rationalize the difference between good and bad. My moral compass doesn't always point north, but it sure isn't pointing due south either.

Kuman seberang laut boleh nampak, gajah depan mata tak nampak.

Sellouts.

2011-07-30T20:20:00.004+08:00

Wow. Memoirs of A Romantic is collecting dust now huh?

Literally. I can't remember a decent post I wrote in a few months already. The reason of which, is firstly I've been working my butt off at Ikea. And I'm a tad too lazy to blog during my off days or late at night. Secondly, inspiration comes at funny times for me. Never when I'm infront of my laptop. Usually when I'm away. I'd have an idea in my head, but nowhere to channel the idea,

and I end up forgetting them. And the cycle repeats.

Well, I hope this is the first of many blogs to come?

Here's whats on my mind.

Sellouts.

What are they? People who cater to the masses in general. They are willing to bend, or break their initial principles which they have set up long ago.

Why they become what they are despite their initial reservations? Alot of reasons actually. Some personal, some business, and some reasons might be invalid to the common reasonable man.

Everyone becomes a sellout at one point in their lives. We made big promises to ourselves, or even others about what we were/were not going to do in the future. But things don't always go as planned. Things are always going to get worse first, before the finally get better. So until we see the sun, we'd just sit in the dark for abit.

However, it does annoy me when people are labelled as sellouts in the music industry though. Avenged Sevenfold gave up their screaming for mellower vocals in the current albums. Incubus' latest album is slower than the previous albums, and that too were they labelled sellouts by the fans alike.

I don't think its called selling out when its a direction that the band takes to diversify the music. All bands go through it. Its called evolution. The inherent talent is branched out. I mean, they can't produce 10albums which sound exactly the same can they? What legacy is there to leave behind. When they're 60 and retired, they get to say "I've tried it all." It might not have all worked out the way they would've wanted it, but its THEIR legacy.

John Mayer for one is a man who values his legacy. What has not he tried? He has risen up the ranks from his acoustic album in Room For Squares, things got slightly heavier in Heavier Things, the blues rebirth in Continuum, ventured in the pop world with Battle Studies, and hopefully embracing Bob Dylan in his latest album Born and Raised.

Who are we to questions ones musical direction. Its a personal choice as its their own pot of rice(periuk nasi) No one ever said anything to you when you started wearing Topman when you swore yourself from them years ago did they? #facepalm

A fan is supposed to be a fan regardless of the kind of music the artist produced. Selfproclaimed fanatics who label an artist as sellouts aren't really fans at all are they?

Besides, there are other sellouts closer to home than the ones in Hollywood. This is the point in the blog where I say, read between the lines.

My Never Ending Obsession.

2011-06-02T21:56:00.011+08:00

To all you naysayers who think that rockclimbing is easy, take a look at this and tell me whether you can do it.

That man is Chris Sharma. He is one of the worlds best rockclimber. Thats pure athleticism on that wall. He's devoted 15years of his life on climbing only. You can imagine what kind of start he had.

Look at his physique for that matter! He probably isn't gonna win Mr Universe or anything, but its one thing having muscles to impress, but muscles that you actually utilize? Whats the point of having a big ass car, if you don't drive it. Floor the pedal and hear the engine roar? Same logic. This guy is awesome. My inspiration for that matter.

If you ask me, climbing is all about mind over matter. What the mind conceives, the body achieves. I guess I got over my fear of heights as I started wallclimbing a year ago. I feel like this is what I wanna do. I mean, not for a living, but as a lifestyle. Its hard to explain why this underrated sport is addictive, but you'll understand if you try climbing.

In the words of the great man himself,

"Climbing is a never ending cycle of finding something that you're really motivated on, obsessing over it, and once you get to the top, celebrating it for a little while and moving on to the next thing." - Chris Sharma

Where Did It Go?

2011-06-02T00:00:00.003+08:00

Its one of those days where I ask myself,

WHERE DID ALL THE MONEY GO?!

I swear I've to learn to keep track of my expenses. I mean, there's so many places I can spend my money especially with my modest lifestyle. And the responsibility of having bills to pay. Dear god. Why do we have to grow up?

Things were so much simpler when I was using prepaid. Before I had twitter, and foursquare. Now I'm paying for mobile internet -__-' gedik. Sigh. Petrol, and tolls. Dear God, I'm enough of a jew already when it comes to petrol. I'm not sure how much more can I limit my travel.

My outings nowadays consists of one-on-ones most of the time. I hardly ever go out in groups anymore. No real reason there.

I really wanna be able to work full time at Ikea again. This once-a-week thing isn't really working out. I really need the money for europe, and my other wants. I'm spending 23bucks a week for wallclimbing as it is. I get to climb for 69bucks a month if I become a member at camp5. But I first need to have a bank account which they would deduct from automatically. But now that money is scarce, I shall put that on hold.

Plus I need money for my new climbing shoes soon. My last climb left both shoes with holes. I guess its time for new ones. Been using it for a year plus already. Heh.

How I wish I had more money.

A Modern Day Chess Game.

2011-05-16T12:28:00.002+08:00

We're a few days past the iconic tragedy that is of 13th May. The racial tension in 1969 which led to bloodshed between the different racial entities, mainly the Malays and the Chinese. I read an article a few minutes ago. It was about the possibility of another May 13 incident occurring in modern day.

You see, its been 42 years of peace and harmony between the races. Do we really need to get out of line, and allow more bloodshed? But I can tell you this. Racial tension is at its highest at the moment. The whole 'ketuanan Melayu' is really catching up on us. The Malays have to stop invoking this constitutional provision every time we feel threatened.

Yes, I admit it was the social contract which allowed the immigrants(Chinese and Indian) to attain Malaysian citizenship. For the citizenship, the Malays would have special priviledges which we so defend with our lives. Nothing is wrong there. But should we evolve? Should we give some privileges to non-bumis to have a slice of the cake we've been consuming the past year 50+ years?

This is up for debate. But you know what, lets not get into that right now. I wrote this post due to the possibility of another 13th May incident. I admit. Racial tensions are high. We don't really integrate as one. The 1Malaysia campaign is being oh so propagated among the citizens in an effort for unity.

But I tell you this. Malaysia is a very unique country. Never in the history of the world that 3 equally huge racial entities, can co-exist in one small country that is ours. Our dark spot was May 13th. And since then, we've been tolerating each other pretty darn well. I'm not saying that we should all love and hug eachother. But just for the sake of tolerating, we've done a pretty good job at it. Look at your family for instance. Yeah, they are your flesh and blood. Cousins and whatnot. Do you love them all? Maybe not. But you do tolerate their presence for the sake of us being a family.

Malaysia is like one big family. We have that uncle who has alot of money. That cousin who probably eats way too much. But the punchline, is that WE ARE FAMILY. We survive as one. And no doubt in my mind, that we could co-exist together hands down. No need for racial confrontations and unnecessary violence.

Back in highschool, I experienced a similar situation. Like it or not, RMC is a system of hierarchies. The form 5's are the Kings, form 4's are the Knights, form 3's are the Rooks, and form 2's are the pawns. We know our position, and we don't make moves which we're not allowed. And we respected that.

When I was in form 4, they changed the system. Intakes no longer starts in form 2. The newboys, would enter in form 4. Now that caused quite and uproar among us. At that time, I was in RMC for already 3 years. I served my way up to the position I am. Now these boys came in, thinking that they're on equal par with us? And next year, my batch would be the Kings. Are these boys gonna fight for that equal right?

Hell no we won't allow it. Alot of people predicted that there would be a huge fight between the two batches. But you know what, we didn't. There was never a fist-fight between us. The position and everything. For the sake of cooperation. We were a unit all the boys in RMC. It would be a bad example for the rest of the juniors at the time.

Isn't that similar to the racial tension we have right now? Thats what I thought. There's nothing wrong with coexisting with eachother in perfect harmony. No need for unnecessary violence. We're much better than that. We're civilized, and mature.

Its time that we acted that way.

The Island Getaway.

2011-05-15T01:32:00.008+08:00

The best laid plans, are the ones which actually go as according to it. And you know what, me and my buddies, we ain't all talk either! HOOOAH!

It all started early Saturday morning. The plan was to leave KL as soon as possible. This was expected to be at 4am. So we did. Was with Naqi from 2am till, 4 which was when we made a move to our rendezvous point; Iylia's place.

'Somebody' just woke up at 4am! So we had to wait an extra half hour or so.(hint: starts with I, ends with smail.) HAHA. Sorry brah, this is my official report for the whole trip. Right, so loading the car and everything we pretty much left KL around 5am. I'm not sure what happened the next few hours, because I passed out till about 7 or 8am.

I did remember finally waking up to stretch my legs at Caltex in Kahang, Johor. You see, these are the petrol stations where they have attendants to fill it up for you. Everyone either stretched their legs, or went to the loo. Adam left the left back door open, with his iPhone conveniently placed at the door handle. And the attendant, a Malay lady was filling up the gas. Iylia was in the front seat shutting down from the long drive. So he just sat there. And what do you know, the iPhone went missing as we were about to leave the station.

So there goes an extra hour looking for the phone. No doubt in my mind that it was that attendant who stole the phone. We asked around, no one seems to know anything. Including that very employee who filled up our car. Then I noticed that the station was equiped with CCTV. So we spoke to the manager to look at it. And no suprise, we caught that lady in the act. Her left hand reaching well into the car, and closing the door with her right there after.

Took awhile to get her to confess. But Naqi played badcop pretty darn bad-ass like. After several threats, she finally cracked and gave us back the phone. We later found out that she was a new employee who just started work the day before. Heh.

Yeah that was our first mishap on the trip. But I must say that it was sort of a blessing in disguise. We reached Mersing around 10.30am. Had a quick breakfast and went straight to the jetty. We got the last 5seats of the ferry to Tioman. Talk about luck huh? And we didn't even have to wait long. The journey in the ferry was way longer than I expected. Twas a good 2 hours before we finally got to the island.

Got there around 1.30pm. The view was majestic. The water was crystal clear. We could see fishes swimming all around the jetty. Walked towards the town where the shuttle to our Berjaya Hotel was waiting for us. The first shuttle was full, so we had to wait for the next one. While we were waiting, a man approached us. He spoke pretty good english to us. Suprised me quite a bit since we were clearly malay students. haha. Anyways, yeah he made us an offer to take us around the island for snorkelling at 5 different spots, a trip to a waterfall on the island, and a visit to the turtle sanctuary on the otherside of the island. All in, 600bucks. Which meant it was 120 bucks per head since there was 5 of us.

It was the best decision we made on the whole trip. That covered our itinerary for activities. We spread it out over a course of 2 days. Since we were gonna be there for 3 nights. So we just went back to the hotel and chilled in our rooms till petang. It was about 6pm when we step foot on the beach. At this time, the tide has receded, so not really much of the sea. The water was crystal clear though. Our chalet was awesome. It was just a few meters away from the beach.

Went back to the chalet around maghrib and I passed out. I only woke up the next morning around 7am. Everyone was still asleep, so I decided to take a walk on the beach on my own. Words can't describe how beautiful the beach was early in the morning. The sun was barely up, so it was pretty dim and the wind was awesome. Therapeutic at its best. And it was free.

It was about 8 when I walked back to my room to shower. We promised to meet with our guide at 9am. Showered and everything. I put on my shirt first before applying sunblock. Take not of this. This would ultimately lead to unbearable suffering for the next 2 days. Yes it did. Had breakfast after that at a restaurant outside the hotel. Which has awesome food mind you. And it was fairly priced. Especially since we heard that the food here is darn expensive.

So our guide, Paksu took us to the jetty after our breakfast. There, awaited our chariot for the day. A small speed boat. On the way there, I conveniently cut my big toe on a piece of tile sticking out of the jetty. And a wound plus sea water, equals pain. But you know, I just sucked it in. It was supposed to be our fun day today. So I ignored the pain most of the day. Our sea guide was a chap whom we call Abang Khairul. He wasn't very tall, but he had a body to die for. Like a real beachboy. His tan was, well to be honest.. he was charred. And I ain't talking he was dark because he was born that way. It was because he spent alot of time in the sun I guess. Yeah. The first spot he took us was the marine park. For most of us, me included it was our first time snorkelling. So when you see fishes bigger than your thigh swimming pretty darn close to you, you'll get freaked out. And yes, we were pretty scared at first. But we warmed up to the idea of having fishes swimming around us.

We had bought a loaf of bread and bananas before heading out to sea. It turned out to be a really good idea. We had something to lure the fishes really close to us. And the bananas were quick food for us to munch on at sea. It digested pretty quick, so we din really have to worry about having it mess up our swimming. Yeah after our fourth snorkelling spot, we stopped for lunch. The best part about the whole deal, was that we got the boat for just the 5 of us. So the timetable went according to us. I'm pretty sure that we stayed for lunch for about an hour.

Iylia brought his fishing rod on the trip, so we went fishing after lunch! So we went a couple of miles away from the shoreline and dropped our line. There were two lines that we used. Each with two hooks attached to it. And in total, we caught a total of 12 fishes I believe. Which we had for dinner that night mind you. And no, we didn't cook it on our own. We just brought the fishes to a restaurant and they cooked it for us.

Remember that part where I said I only applied sunblock to the skin exposed with my tshirt on? Yeah. We forgot to bring sunblock on our snorkelling trip. So hell yeah. I got pretty darn sunburnt on my shoulders especially. The next two nights, I had to sleep on my stomach instead of my sides as I usually do. Heh.

So the next day, we were to head on over to the waterfall. The guide promised to meet us at 10, so we expected a big ass 4x4 vehicle waiting for us. Sadly, the only car available to us was a Kembara. And all five of us crammed into that small car. With Adam having to seat in the boot! haha. I was pretty scared at how the route to the top actually was. It was steep as hell. If the brakes, or the engine for that matter.. gave way, it wouldn't be a good way to die. It went straight up, instead of the conventional zig zag like most highways going up would go. And the journey was less than stellar to be honest. It was uncomfortable. Having your sunburnt skin bump into your friend's shoulder didn't make it better. Heh.

But it all was worth the pain when we got to the waterfall. Bloody hell. Icy cold water on sunburnt skin, paradise. It felt as if I found an oasis in the middle of the dessert. The waterfall was really pretty. And the water wasn't as deep. I mean, I just recently heard that a couple of people drowned at a waterfall. So it was all good.

It was after that that we went up to Kampung Juara. It was the other side of the island which was facing the South China Sea. We first went to a turtle sanctuary. It was very much a private foundation. No governmental funds came to this project. And it was ran by a foreigner. I can't remember her name, but she was purrrdy :D It was said that she's been here for the past 2 years. Can you believe that? Dropping everything back home, to help conserve the turtles who came down to the island? That my friend, is noble.

We had lunch soon after. It was at this beach near a jetty. The food looks great. The restaurant was by the beach. And we sat at a table which was literally on the sand. The breeze was fantastic. We took a dip in the water first before we had lunch. Sea water would always be sea water. And by that, I meant I had alot of salt in my diet the whole trip. -__-' Anyways, food here was ridiculously expensive mind you. So that wasn't easy on my wallet. heh. But but but, there were lawn chairs on the beach. They were under palm trees. And I took the opportunity to take a cat nap under them. Oh dear god, it was the best nap I've ever had. The sound of the ocean caressing the sand, the breeze keeping you company. Hmmmm.. :DDD

Went back to the chalet after that and had some rest. The plan was to hit a beach bar that night. We found one yesterday, but it was pretty dead at the time. That night it was quite lively. A group of tourists were in Tioman for scubadiving licenses. So they were at the bar. Drunken foreigners usually equals to noise. Haha. Yeah. And there was a fireshow that night. The bartenders were playing with fire. You know those ropes with a torch attached to it at the end? Yeah. But there was this one chick who randomly spoke to Adam and Naqi. Rachel her name was. Kecoh la jugak after that incident. Haha. Suka diorang.

Yeah the next morning, we got our bags packed for the trip home since checkouts was at 12. Our ferry back to the mainland was at 2.30. We had lunch at a small shop near the jetty. And that concludes our trip to Tioman Island.

I highly recommend everyone the island to anyone who wishes for a brief getaway. It did me some good. I forgot about my life outside the island during my trip. If you wanna go snorkelling like I did, look for Pak Su. He'll give you a great deal if you come in a group of 4 or more. Oh cigarettes and liquor is duty free for all you party people. No one cares who you are on this island I swear. You're completely anonymous. Great place to come.

Kings And Queens.

2011-05-04T17:00:00.008+08:00

I haven't written material like this in over a year. I think this particular one is worth sharing with. Tell me what you think about it! :)

Kings and Queens.

I've loved, I've lived, and I've cried,
There's nothing that I haven't tried.

I'm emotional, sensitive and weak,
You took the words before I could ever speak.

You wanted the moon, the stars and everything in between,
You were my everything, my love, my heart, and my queen.

I've accepted that we're worlds apart, tolerating eachother just to be true,
I wish I could say that you accepted my opinions too.

I've come to that point where I realize that I'm better off on my own,
King of the world, bold and free on my non-existent throne.

I know that one day I'll sing my song to a different queen,
So much better than the one you've ever been.

Its Not You, Its Me.

2011-05-03T23:51:00.006+08:00

Forget what they told you. I'mma tell it straight, no sugar coating, no nothing. Everyone is going to leave you. One way or another. Its just how it is. And when they say,

"its not you, its me."

Take their word for it and not disregard the reason for doing so as a cheesy line in 99% of all movies where couples separate for their own selfish gain. And there's nothing in hell that you can do to change their mind.

To a certain extent, everyone deserves to be selfish in their life. Who are you to convince them otherwise? The faster you digest that idea in your thick skull, the easier the dust would settle. Having that being said. Accept it. Take it like a man. Swallow it down like a god-awful bitter pill the doctor prescribed you remedy your illness.

Like all things in this world, it ain't easy to accept the harsh truth. But you'd feel so much better once you take it in, instead of believing in that delusional world of yours that everything will be alright. It won't. It won't be alright until you make it alright. Making it alright means that you have to accept it one way or another.

And please, as you're reading this don't assume that this only applies to being heartbroken and all that crap which can be associated with love. Personal decisions, are all part and parcel of walking away. Walking a step further away in the opposite direction to satisfy that growing desire of your own personal goal.

Nothing peculiarly wrong with that.

But bear in mind, that every step you take in the opposite direction means that you're walking away from who you used to be, and towards who you want to be. When you're figuring out who you want to be, it becomes terrible difficult to remain objective. All the lines will be blurred. Morality may no longer be a criteria in this aspect.

You will be open to new things that you may not be fond of in the past, and you know what, that's alright. Just never forget who you used to be. The person who knew nothing until he walked into adulthood and possess the newfound ability to do so. Nothing is bad when its something that you really want, but bear in mind that certain personal decisions may not be the best thing for everyone else besides you.

And when the time comes that you decide to walk back into someone's life, after that long absence, things may have changed. You may no longer be that person that I used to know. I may no longer be able to relate to you as well as we used to.

And thats what scares me the most about people walking away from me. I too have to consider that maybe they share a similar opinion when I decide to walk away from them. What I know is, thats its purely a personal decision. They must have a good reason for wanting to do so. Or do they?

Heh. Pardon my emo-ness. My best bud just left for UK after 7months of absence, and only 3 weeks of being back here. We literally grew up with eachother, ever since we were in diapers. And when you're so used to seeing that same face every other day, having them gone takes alot out of you.

I remember the moment as if it were yesterday that he suprised me and I screamed out "WEI KAU BUAT APA DKAT SINI SIALLLL!!!"... infront of his mom. HAHAHAHA.

See, thats why I haven't blogged since then. Sent him off to KLIA this morning. Both taknak emotional, so we said our goodbyes in a macho-esque way of a handshake with a stiff hug. Rindu kau Al Amin. Cepat balik please?

Now thats what I call bromance.

Make You Feel My Love.

2011-04-23T20:51:00.002+08:00

Everything tastes like chicken when you have someone to share it with.

Every song sung to that special someone means the world. Its especially great when you both can relate to it. And it leaves a significant mark. That from that point onwards, for years to come, everytime that song comes on the radio, you'd think of the person who first sang it to you.

Every distinct smell, would trigger a variety of emotions when you've previously shared that feeling with someone else. It tricks your brain to go to that special place only we know. And the best part of it is not noticing that you're smiling like a fool in the midst of the busy world going on around you.

Ah sweet memories.

I can tell you that I'm replaying such moments now. As I'm writing this very blog post, I can't decide whether or not to feel happy for having the opportunity to experience it, or feel sad that it has already passed.

I don't like going out against the world on my own. Waiting for a text message that may never come, from anyone for that matter. Have you ever felt so alone in your life? I know I have. From my humble beginnings of having everything I could ever wish for, to having nothing at all.

I had it all, and I let it slip through my hands.

Our memories, is something you can never take away from me.

What The Future Promises.

2011-04-12T00:50:00.002+08:00

Had a long chat with my brother in law after dinner over my career options. You see, I've been studying law for almost 3 years now. You might assume that I have attained my field of interest to pursue in the future, but sadly I do not.

Heck, I don't know whether or not to go into litigation or venture into corporate, or maybe into conveyancing. I can tell you one thing that is. I like to argue, I like to talk. And I like to meet people. That pretty much points towards litigation. But I don't know. Litigation is where the profession has been made into superstardom.

But thats not entirely the case. You may get the fame and recognition of a quote-unquote gunfighter of the legal industry. But it doesn't really promise much of a future financially speaking. Especially if you are a fresh graduate. Not to say that litigation doesn't promise a bright future, yes we do have really successful lawyers in this field, but they are the exception to the general rule.

I told him that I'd want to do something which would reward me financially. He suggested corporate law. More specifically, into banking. Further scratch of the head.. Like I said, no decision has been made. He's just broadening my horizon of career opportunities.

Before you tell me that I'm greedy for having money on my mind, let me just tell you something. Its different when you grew up with mummy and daddy spoonfeeding you everything you ever wanted. All you had to do was ask. I never had that priviledge.

I'm not complaining for the way that I was brought up, I just want to give my family the best possible living conditions imaginable. When the financial aspect of is blurred out, I can give them the things I never got. Send my kids to good schools, go on wonderful vacations overseas, and generally have a good time.

I've always believed the principle that, "You are nobody until you make your own dollar."

But let's not get ahead of ourselves. I'm not yet a qualified lawyer. There's a long way to go before I can call myself a law student. Fingers crossed.

The Justice System.

2011-04-10T21:49:00.003+08:00

Have you ever thought about how the justice system really works? There are offences where you are dealt with a warning, some punishable with a fine, other's a jailterm, and of course, the death penalty.

The justice system works in three ways. Rehabilitation, retribution, and deterrence. Rehabilitation in the form of reshaping convicts to leave the crime world to be able to live in harmony with other member's of society. Sometimes all it takes is a few years in prison to get their head screwed in straight. Some go through rehab.

Retribution is where the punishment criminals receive is what they deserve for commiting such heinous crimes. Be it a long-term jail term, corporal punishment, or simply hung to their death. Lex talionis. The law retaliates. Everyone has their place in society. There's a line that no one crosses in the sand. Go past it, and you're screwed.

The justice system incorporates a sense of deterrence in the punishment of criminals. It works where these convicts are made an example for their wrongdoings. The logic works in two ways, firstly where it deters the criminal from ever committing the offence a second time, or to the public at large with fear of the punishment from the justice system.

But there are times where you may not agree with the punishment the justice system decides. Even though the actual offence happened to you, the decision for to punish the offender is no where near yours. The system decides it even though you were the one who walked through the gates of hell and back. Especially if you didn't die in the process.

Its only human to wish the person to rot in hell for their actions. Or just fucking die for that matter. They don't know what it feels like to going be going through this. Its not just what they did that matters. Its the trauma of having that thought playing in your mind long after they're gone to satisfy that stupid need in their head.

Its not fucking fair. Why am I paying the price for being the victim? Where the fuck is your end of the bargain? I didn't ask for this. I never wanted any of this.

Fuck karma, I want you walk a day in my shoes so you know what it feels like to be me.

Work Ethics.

2011-04-09T00:09:00.002+08:00

Newsflash, here's the thing with me. I may not be the most hardworking person to work with when it comes to group assignments, but when I put my foot down and finally decide on doing it. I go all out.

I don't accept half assed submissions. I don't accept doing it just for the sake of doing it. Which sorta qualifies me for an OCD I guess? Heh. Maybe not. But I don't understand doing work for the sake of getting it done.

It has to be perfect. I need to know the parameters of my said assignment, what to work on, what not to work and the whole nine yards. Which makes me abit on the annoying side to enquire upon my fellow classmates the extent of their work. Yes I compare end products of assignments.

Its not that I'm trying to be better than everyone else. Trust me, if there's someone who wants to be better than everyone else, I'll be the last person to be so. I'd rather linger somewhere in the line of averageness(wrong grammar, so sue me). Decent, but not full marks.

Not really sure why I'm blogging about this. Heh. Just another random fact about me I guess. I just hate to be caught with my pants down. Rather be insecure about your work and be rewarded with good news, than being confident with your work and get hell from your lectuerer for it. True, no?

A Venomous Species, We Are.

2011-04-05T19:11:00.004+08:00

To be honest, I'm starting to get sick of the human race. So much hatred, so much negativity its unbelievable that we're tolerating this sons of bitches in our society.

Lets talk about the current status of these people yeah? I don't care whether they maybe from riches or from the slums, for all I care is why they can't be civilized.

Civilized people don't whisper venom into people's ears and watch them go at it in a no hold's barred contest. Thank God that doesn't happen. Hold the presses, it does! These kinds of situation are rampant!

The way I see it, people who are firebreathers of envy and wrath are insecure. That they need everyone else's support to bring people that threaten their position. There's an imaginary chain of social standing. If they see you threatening their position, they won't try to beat you fair and square. They fucking turn people against you.

Hit a nerve yet?

I don't care what kind of beef you have with another person. As long as it concerns two people, it should stay between two people. You don't fucking instill hate and negativity in others to support that cause you so bravely fight for. And when I say bravely, I mean turning people against eachother for the sake of your selfish personal gain.

But you know whats funny? People like these are the ones who would smile to your face and stab you in the back. Brave in a pack, but flees like a coward man to man. Way to go asshole!

Can't we all just get along? No. I need to turn everyone else against you so that the world knows that I'm right and you're wrong.

My stand on this is simple. As long as you ain't a prick to me, man you can do what you want. Just keep your punk-ass negativity the fuck away from me.

Susah sangat ke buat hal sendiri tak kacau orang? Perlu sangat ke nak jaga tepi kain orang, buat gossip tak tentu pasal nak menyusahkan hidup orang? Inilah Melayu. Tak boleh tengok orang lain hidup senang.

Trade-Offs.

2011-04-04T23:22:00.005+08:00

Life is all about making trade-offs.

You may have won the battle, but that doesn't necessarily concedes the war. There are some fights that you endure and even how prepared you are, you still lost. But sometimes winning isn't the whole point. Its the lesson learnt at the end of the day.

The imperative question when it comes to trade-offs, is what are you willing to compromise for the bigger picture in total?

Situations which trade-offs are considerably significant.

1) The Quest For Companionship

Lets face it, no one is made perfect. After all, thats just how God made everyone equal. A pretty girl who seems to have everything in check for her, may just be another pretty face. A pretty face means nothing if her insides are rotten. No need to go into detail here. What I'm saying is that beauty is skin-deep, because we pretty much look the same if not for whats above the surface.

Its human vanity and the need to want to be surrounded by beautiful people. Be it male or female. But eventually, you'd have to trade-off certain qualities as your mate. Do you wish to be with a person who is nice on the outside, but not so nice on the inside? See what I mean?

2) Economical Well Being

Money makes the world go round. In surplus, it makes people happy and in deficiency people become restless. Money management too, requires an element of compromise. Lets put it this way. Income is x, Expenses are y. As long as x=y, everyone is happy. But not everyone has the liberty of such equations.

To some people, the situation is y>x. And to balance it out, certain sacrifices have to be made. Especially on a limited budget. To buy that acoustic guitar that you've always wanted, or to complete your wallclimbing gear, or get your car pimped up, or to just have a good day out. Trade-offs. Hate em', but you can't run away from them.

3) Studies

If you ask me today whether I enjoy studying, I'd say no. I'd rather skip the studying and start making my own money and perhaps make a name for myself. But sadly, we live in a world that requires certain qualifications to be deemed successful. 40 years ago, this wasn't necessary. But then agian, 40 years ago, I wasn't born yet.

Law is a tough course to study. I look at all my friends who're mostly in private colleges, its all class and lepak. You simply can't do that in law. My syllabus is significantly heavier than them I suppose that I simply cannot afford to do so. Not saying that they don't have their own battles that is. Its all about levels. What I'm encountering maybe something they'll never understand, and vice versa.

Having that being said, if it were up to me I'd spend more time with my friends. But I can't. Thats my trade-off for studies. Do I enjoy it? Hell no. Is it completely necessary? Fuck yeah.

So that concludes the 3 general trade-offs of a typical single, 21yearold boy I can think of right now. Any truth innit?

Fight Or Flight.

2011-03-31T00:39:00.003+08:00

Fear is a double edged sword. Use it properly, and it shall be your friend. Underestimate it and it shall be your foe.

Biology tells you that everytime you are faced with a life threatening experience your adrenal glands pump your blood stream with adrenaline. It does so to prepare you for either a fight or flight situation.

In times of great emergency a human being may do things way beyond his normal capability. He can run faster, leap higher and endure more things he wouldn't be able to do so under normal circumstances.

Fear compels you to do so as well. You fear of the worst which is to come so you take the higher road and do everything you can to avoid the unexpected. A person who wishes to be successful in the future does his very best in his studies. To be well qualified for a minimal requirement set. That in hope it'll improve his odds in the competitive job market.

Some people, do the exact opposite by taking a gamble. More of a hands on person rather than a brainiac. Is this foolish? Not necessarily. Some people have all the luck. An impressive GPA doesn't guarantee anything. It is however a safer way to play the game.

People who play it safe dare not tread in the deep end. They don't swim in waters where they can neither see or feel the bottom. Why? They fear that if they do and something bad happens in the process, it becomes a life threatening experience and they lose control of the outcome.

Adrenaline junkies say what? Fuck it. Life's too short for calculative decisions. You've only got one life, might as well do the best you can and if the unthinkable happens, die happy.

Love is a fight or flight situation for me. The idea of a relationship terrifies me. Not being in one makes me long to be in one. Does that mean I'm ready for one? Nah. I'll take my chances being alone. I took a gamble once by fighting it out. How did it turn out for me? Heh.

absofuckingFantastic.

What point is a memory if it teaches you nothing?

I didn't just bite the bullet, I grinded the bullet to little shards, broke all my teeth in the process, and drowned in my own blood.

The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword.

2011-03-23T23:40:00.004+08:00

It seems that blogs have gone out of fashion. The blogging trend has stopped dead in its tracks. Long gone are the days where people actually pen out their deepest thoughts into lyrical sense and share it with whoever cares to read.

Instead, blogging is now in the form of colourful abstract pictures with a simple caption at the bottom which at times, makes no sense at all. Yes I'm talking about tumblr. And its funny, that when I ask people if they have blogs they'd proudly share their tumblr URL's.

And why am I not suprised that their tumblr looks exactly like everyone elses? Reposting isn't exactly blogging. I admit, its colourful, simple and very convenient. But it is still not a blog. Not in my eyes anyways.

But hold on, I'm not saying that you are not a blogger if you have a tumblr. I'm just expressing my frustration of not being able to read decent blogs with actual words in it. If I may add, are becoming endangered species.

But more than anything I think its a trend. It was cool to have a blog at one point. Then slowly everyone lost interest, they then become abandoned. No updates for months at a time. Heh. You know what else is a trend? Social networking.

Twitter, and Formspring accounts to be more specific. You see, my Twitter account is like the voice in my head in 140 characters or less. Its like thinking out loud ya know? I hardly care what people think of my tweets, because its strictly my opinion. I don't really try to be politically correct on my account.

There are people who'd scream and shout about pretty much every single thing that goes wrong. Cursing, pointing fingers, blaming everyone else for the shit that happens in their life. Now these are the real abusers of Twitter. To a certain extent, I can understand, but all the time everyday? Damn, you've got issues.

I think having a Formspring account is like painting a bullseye at the back of your head. You open an avenue where people can ask disgusting questions, anonymously. Need I not tell the kinds of questions perverts ask on Formspring. Hate questions, childish immature statements which they can't say up front to you. At the edge of their fingertips. Yeah thats Formspring in 140 characters or less.

Twitter is also the reason why my blog has gone quiet this past year or so. Tweeting about it is way more convenient than typing a blog post out. I do filter my followers though. I have this policy of not allowing people to follow me who I've never met in the flesh. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be snobbish or whatever. Its just that my foursquare check-ins are visible in tweets, and I wouldn't wanna be stalked by people I have no known ties with.

If anyone still updates their blogs regularly please do email me. I need some reading material late at night. Thanks! :)

do send me your URL at amirul_irfan@hotmail.com. I'm dying to read something good. I'll definitely link you if I like what I'm reading. Cheers!

The Weekend.

2011-03-22T01:00:00.003+08:00

I've noticed a change of direction in my writing style. Wind the clock back to a year ago, my posts were all about myself and my whereabouts. My interests, dislikes and etcetera. Nowadays? Its more towards opinions, and food for thought posts.

Just for old times sake, Imma update those who care to know what I've been up to for a change.

An awesome weekend I had. The best I've had in a loooooong time. Is a friday considered the weekend? *key Rebecca Black's nasal-y Friday in background*

"FRIED EGGS FRIED EGGS FRIED EGGS"

AMAGAD. Have you heard the song? Sheeesh. Its crazily annoying. Go Youtube it nowww!

Right. Friday. Friday has been my unofficial wallclimbing day for most of the year. I've been climbing with Izyan rather consistantly this year. She's awesome. We motivate and challenge eachother to try harder routes everytime. And we tried the rock face this time around. Bloody hell it tough.

What I really wanna do is try climbing at different venues. I'm dying to try the wall at Extreme Park Shah Alam, also real rock at Batu Caves. Both I hope to do within 2011.

Saturday, I had a UiTM programme to attend. Was on faculty from 9am till about 6pm. Considered going back home straight after the long day, but decided against it cos my buddies wanted to head over to the driving range.

You see, I've never been a fan of golf. Like, ever. So take my word that I was suprised at how much fun I had at the driving range! The five of us, extremely jakun due to the fact that only 2 of us are acquainted to the sport. I'm sure we pissed off the guy next to us with our loud antics. haha ;p

Right after golf, headed back to Naqi's place for a quick swim. Did a few laps in the pool just to cool off after our time at the driving range. Treated ourselves to Nasi Arab courtesy of Iylia's mom before heading back out.

Our destination? The Lookout Point Bukit Ampang! You see I've never been there before, and it was fun heading out to KL late at night for a change. I don't fancy KL to be honest. I've never had a reason to venture there. The view was breathtaking. We could see all the lights in KL, including the twin towers. And we were all suprised at how cosy it was up there. The food isn't as expensive as I thought it would be either! :)

That was the icing to our weekend. Semester 3 has been the most exciting semesters we've had up to date. I have a feeling we'd be going to driving range more often now. haha.

Oh sidenote, there's this new Disco Rollerskating Rink which opened up in Subang Avenue. I WANNA GOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Alluring Invites.

2011-03-20T14:07:00.002+08:00

You know how there's a greek saying about Helen of Troy? The very one which led to the demise of the Trojans? Helen was married to a King of Sparta but ran away with the Prince of Troy. The Spartan's pretty much used this excuse to invade Troy.

The saying goes, Helen had the face that could launch a thousand ships.

In modern context, I'd break it down this way. Yeah she was gorgeous. Was she worth the demise of the people of Troy? probably not.

Is a girl worth a fist-fight? Cold war's and stand-off's? Brotherhoods broken upon seeking love of one? I'd say no. Its not worth the ordeal of going through childish displays of ego and manliness.

You want a girl that bad? No need to fend off other people like barbarians do. Go for the ones with the word 'Vacant' stamped on her forehead. figuratively speaking of course.

Have some class and pride. Win a girl's heart by being yourself. Not by breaking every other guy's bones and self esteem. Trying to appear Alpha usually ends up with you looking Beta. I've said this countless times over the years. But some people still never get the picture.

Having all that being said.

No a face cannot launch a thousand ships. I can tell you that a slip of the tongue can.

Continuous slip of the tongue to the wrong people, and word gets around. And let the flames begin.

Dream A Little Dream Of Me.

2011-03-07T01:22:00.003+08:00

I felt somewhat blue today.

I noticed that I blog a lot more when I'm generally happy. Does that mean I'm not happy nowadays? Can't give you an answer there. Lets just say that, I've been 'busy'.

That seems to be the most politically correct statement I can come up with.

Singing along to soulful tunes has gotten me through the night countless times. Even therapeutic if I might add. So here's a random cover of the song that made my day. Its called Dream A Little Dream Of Me by The Mama's and The Papa's. Sung originally by Nat King Cole.

Just hold me tight, and tell me you'll miss me.

Into The Night Of A Dark Black Night.

2011-03-01T00:13:00.004+08:00

To be honest I'm pretty stoked for this season's American Idol. The youngsters are taking America by storm! We're looking at really talented people going at it man. If you've yet to watch American Idol, its not too late to start. Top 24 starts on Wednesday. We have extraordinary ranges from Adam Lambert-ish, to a really unique singing voice by this country singing dude.

Shit, I feel inferior listening to them sing. If only I was blessed with such vocal range as they have. But then again, half the world population can sing in tune either. So its safe to say that not everyone can sing. Pfft.

I can carry a decent tune, but I ain't no Buble. Singing is an escape for me. I'd pick up the guitar and just strum to soulful tunes, and it takes the edge off things ya know? Never fails to cheer me up. Feeling down? Try singing your emotions out. Listen to songs of heartfelt sorrow, and just let it run its course. No harm there.

You can never go wrong with The Beatles. Always stick with The Beatles.

You were only waiting for this moment, to be free.

Personal Space.

2011-02-25T00:03:00.007+08:00

I'm a firm believer that everyone needs their own private space. That you can't be with the same person too long before you get terribly annoyed with their wild antics.

It doesn't matter how good of a friend they are, or how madly in love you could be with them. Without any breathing space it doesn't take long for you to develop a sensible amount of hatred towards them. Hang around the same person long enough and you'd probably get to know them inside out.

Not necessarily a bad thing. Until you find out what's really inside. Like their lack of personal hygiene, or their inability to stand up for themselves. Then you'd have something against them, and it becomes terribly hard no to point out the obvious when it annoys the fuck outta you. Risking a friendship, or suffer the annoyance of such acts.

So you stick around right? Hear them out all the time. Each and every single day. And suddenly their problem becomes your problem too. That's the point of no return. You could either stay and help your friend get through their rough patch, or flee the scene and wish them the best of luck.

If you chose option A, well done. You indeed are a good friend. But I'll you one thing. You're a dumbass to do so. You've volunteered to put things which doesn't belong on your plate, on yours. Making your life even more complicated than it really should be. I mean, they're all grown ups right? No need to meddle somemore to fix shit up for them.

Taking option B usually amounts you to being a bad friend. Heh. But you know, that'll be so much easier for you. You actually have time on your hands instead of getting tangled in nonsensical bullshit soap opera. It's exhausting, and stressful. Doesn't it not seem that way?

Some peace and quiet in my life isn't too much to ask right? Just enough so that I could hear myself think. Just once, I'd like to be selfish and make myself happy instead of worrying about other people's shit. Here's a thought, having someone who'd do the same for me. Not make my problems go away, just make no problems for me. A fair compromise no?

Friendship, relationships, and courtships, are the best when you have absolutely nothing against the person sitting across you. But you're bound to find out things you don't like about with the person you spend most time with. I believe that the less you know about them, the better the relationship is. Have you ever thought of it that way?

Well now you have.

Words I Wanna Hear.

2011-02-20T23:04:00.005+08:00

Nothing hurts more than broken promises. Knowing that things were said in the spur of the moment, and not what the truth really was. Promise not of what I wish to hear, only what you wish to keep.

But you know how it is. Life goes on, so must I. But no one ever told me it was going to be easy. Looking for happiness isn't really working for me. I don't what to do anymore. This is my test from Allah. Never thought I'd be going at it all alone.

I'm not bitter. But I've seen better days.

A man is best described by the words that he speaks. Don't justify promises which were broken. Instead, say only the words which are true to your heart, and the rest shall be written for you.

"Promise you'll stay with me alright? You'll never let me go?"

"NEVER."

Suit Up!

2011-02-16T00:32:00.003+08:00

So like, I had this dinner right..

And, I had to suit up right..

And, I had fun..

And we all looked great.

Teehee :B

Striking Gold.

2011-02-13T00:55:00.003+08:00

Memoirs of A Romantic.

I wonder how I coined that catchy blog title 3 years ago. You've gotta admit. It is pretty catchy right? Riiiiight? ;)

So then I think to myself. Is there much to reminisce about nowadays? Worthy events so to speak. You see, I'm not the type to post up crappy posts. If I do, it has to adhere to certain standards set up by yours truly.

I'd like to think that this is where I channel my heart out. This is how I reach out to my inner self. You know what I mean? This is where I go for inspiration. I'd sit infront of my laptop for an hour or so just penning down the words which eventually turns out into a meaningful blog post.

One day, I'd like to look back on all the times I've recorded, good or bad, and just smile to myself. That I've gone so far. From my humble beginning of writing crappy posts post SPM, till now. (not implying that my current posts are now awesome that is)

it started out as rambling about experiences, past and present, to my hopes and dreams, and to more recently food for thought posts. Thats what I like about the beauty of blogging. That just by one blogpost, I'd somehow get people to think outside the box. Just perhaps, inspire someone to write as how I'd like to write. Don't get me wrong, writing a read-worthy post is one thing. Getting someone to do the same, and read it is completely different.

That what I hope to achieve. Inspiring others to write like journalists. Not to ramble about personal issues all the fucking time, and wash, rinse, spin over and over again. Get inspired. Write something worth reading. Blogs isn't exactly where people go for fame. Having colorful templates, with pictures here and there.

Some of the more interesting bloggers I've discovered didn't have fancy pages. They wrote simple. Yet it left a mark on me. On how I saw things. It would be melodramatic if I said it changed my life right, but it did make me think. Such logic which I've never thought was relevant till after reading it.

Here's my challenge to you. If you have a blog, try it. The satisfaction of writing a rare diamond of a blogpost is much more meaningful in comparison to posting a dime in a dozen post.

Its like striking gold; Creative gold that is.

The Valley Of Shadows.

2011-01-29T03:29:00.003+08:00

Death, is a humbling experience.

Yet, people only fear death when it is imminent. So its okay for them to treat others like crap if they know that they can live to be 100 and repent at age 99. Now thats just morally fucked up.

Attend a funeral in your lifetime, and maybe you'll value life a little bit more than you do right now. I've been to a few and it just showed me how short life really is. Death has no age requirements, old people aren't the only ones who are at risk of dying. The young ones die just as easily.

Religion tells you to embrace death. Not fear it. Life is merely a stepping stone to something even greater. But you know what, I fear death. Not because I wish for immortality, it is the aftershock it brings to the people I dearly care for. But I too fear outliving everyone else. Then I'll have to see my loved ones die. So how do you carry on?

It doesn't matter who you were in your life. Whether or not you were somebody, or nobody. Pretty, or ugly. Rich, or poor. Loved, or loathed. You end up the same way. 6 feet under dirt wrapped in 3 metres of white cloth.

Life is short, live it graciously, and be grateful that you live to see another sunrise. Having that being said, just because you live to watch the sun rise and set doesn't give you the right to live like there's no tomorrow. Yes there's tomorrow. That tomorrow might just be the end of you.

~~Till death do us part~~, or till i find somebody better than you.

oh yes, pun intended.

You'll Go Far Kid.

2011-01-26T22:42:00.005+08:00

I've been fairly busy this past few days. Class is a bitch. Like really. So here's a short one. I happen to really like this song. Jojo sings like an angel. Her soulful and sultry voice enchants me nontheless.

I was told that I used to date a girl who looks like Jojo. I'd someday like to date someone who could sing like her in the future. Maybe? Who knows right? heh.

Are you thoughtful and kind, do you care whats on my mind?

Her Walls Continually Change.

2011-01-17T12:45:00.002+08:00

Not really sure how I seem to overlook this beautiful song by John Mayer.

"I know a girl, who puts the color inside of my world."

For Once, Swallow Your Pride.

2011-01-14T22:38:00.007+08:00

Say, Taylor Swift is a pretty girl right? Talk about being drop dead gorgeous. Quite the songbird too. Well, at least on radio that is.

Look at her list of exes. Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer and very recently, Jake Gyllenhaal. From what I read, seems like Jake blindsided her unexpectedly. Well Jake, news for you my man. She's gonna write a song for you in the next album man. Hopefully it ain't something like "Dear Jake" or something. haha. Sorry John, you messed with the wrong girl! ;p

Which brings me to the next question. Can she somehow attract all the jerks in Hollywood and get dumped by each and every one of them? Or perhaps, okay I said PERHAPS okay? So you Taylor Swift fans don't hate me for saying this, but just maybe, there's simply something wrong with her. An intellectual guess would be, maybe she's a psycho bitch of somesort. Clingy to the point where her beauty can't outweigh her bad habits.

I mean, who says pretty girls don't have ugly habits? Or are perfect for that matter. I mean, we're all humans after all right? Having drawbacks are just part of being human. No harm there. The one thing that I particularly find annoying about her, is her ability to constantly wash her dirty linen in public.

She doesn't only narrate the breakup, she tells the whole world about it too! Which in my opinion, is not cool at all. Its unfair because we only hear one side of the story.

However, I give her chops though. For apologizing to Taylor Lautner. It was said that she was the one who was the heartbreaker in their brief romance. And hey, she did a good job at penning that regret into a hit song, in the form of her latest single, Back To December.

This here, is a real apology for those who have absolutely no idea how to give one to someone who gave a hoot about your feelings. For a girl who was always wronged, I respect Taylor for swallowing her pride and made her peace with Lautner.

See, it ain't that hard to apologize to someone you did wrong. Atleast Taylor saw the light. When will you?

Zip It.

2011-01-11T23:58:00.004+08:00

So here's my 2 cents of the day,

Its completely normal to want to share stuff with your closest friends right?

Lilypad and Marshmallow. They're like peas in a pod. Always together, the sweetest onscreen couple in the history of television if you ask me. But Lily can't really hold a secret in. And would eventually spill the beans to Marshall. and thank god, Marshall spoke not a word to another living soul.

Right. Here's a catch22 situation. Do you still consider your closest confidant a best friend even after the cat is out of the bag? I mean, the secret was meant for them to know only. But they couldn't keep a lid on it and decided to tell just about everyone else.

I hate people who like to play the "its just between you and me" card with the god damn world. Yeah between you and me sounds bloody convincing when you're alone. But what if those people who you said those 6 words to somehow tell managed to find other people whom you've said the exact same thing?

Number one, secret is out. Two, you're a blabbermouth and can never be trusted. And three, you'll probably have a fight with that person who shared the secret with.

Considering all that right? Who is the bigger fool? The one telling the secret hoping the other person would hold it to his chest, or the recipient who eventually lets it out?

My view? The only person I can trust with a secret is myself. Meaning I won't share things which would damage my reputation with another living soul. Even if I do, it won't be important enough that i'd lose a friendship over it.

Two can keep a secret if one of them is dead.

Hello Year 11.

2011-01-05T01:06:00.003+08:00

Happy New Year 2011!

.. to all my followers, if any are still around that is. heh.

Classes just started this week. And I must say things are looking up for me. Its a different new ballgame this year. Since the major screw-up of 2010, I'm hoping this year wouldn't suck as much as last year. And, there's plenty of new fish! ;)

I spent my holidays on the guitar paying homage to John Mayer. I can proudly say that I've got Bigger Than My Body, I'm Gonna Find Another You, Dreaming With A Broken Heart, Gravity and Slow Dancing In A Burning Room under my belt. Should I post it on YouTube? Maybe.

My hard work in Ikea has paid off. Like, literally. Went on quite the shopping spree since my paycheck got cleared. Some essential items, and not so essential items. For a guy right, I am pretty vain with the clothes on my back. Heh. ;p

But still, it isn't enough. Since when is anything ever enough right? You can have all the money, and all the love in this world and still it won't be enough.

I think its time that I count my blessings for once. My family means the world to me. Thats what matters the most. Friends come and go, Lovers leave anytime they feel like it. Flesh and blood, thats forever man.

Here's to not getting buttfucked by fate!

Sippin Sizzurp.

2010-12-18T12:05:00.001+08:00

I sorta like this version better. haha.

This guy has mad skills weh. And I don't even like screamo!

Think About It.

2010-12-13T20:55:00.004+08:00

Once upon a time, lived a naive boy. He's never really been in love. And he was the fool who believed it.

Long story short, he no longer believes in it. He decided that there are only a few things which can appear as love.

That is attraction, companionship, and to a certain extent; lust. Any combination of the three elements mentioned can be assumed to be love.

So I ask you, what exactly is love?

I have no idea.

Is it compromising eachother's deficiencies in personal traits no matter the cost? No wait, thats just foolishness. Butterflies in your stomach? that could just be the leftover nasi lemak you had for lunch. Cute pet names? Thats just your inner child calling out.

There is no ideal definition of love. Love doesn't exist. Science, can't quantify love. I can't explain what love is. I can only tell you that I believe that people put themselves through shit when they think they're in love. So maybe thats just what love is defined.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm not. But I won't change your position on your preferred definition either.

The Awkward Unplanned Rendezvous.

2010-12-08T11:12:00.004+08:00

Don't you hate that awkward feeling when you're somewhere with a group of friends, and you see your other group of friends sitting at the same restaurant or mamak? I certainly do. I'll tell you why.

The decision to whether or not give a casual wave from afar, or to ditch the friends you came with for a lil bit just to say hello to your other friends. Both seem to have consquences.

For one, a casual wave from afar, might potray how cocky you are to those friends you just waved at. On the other hand, ditching your friends just for a while to go to the other table to say your hello's and small talk might piss off the people you came with.

Social dilemma much?

I for one, can't really do the casual wave thingy if I'm relatively close to the group of friends who're at the different table. That'll be downright rude. And my momma taught me to not be rude, and disrespectful.

So if you really wanna be disrespectful to me for wanting to go to the next table, then clearly I'm at the wrong table.

Didn't your mom teach you not to be disrespectful? Or are you too cool to be polite?

Collaboration.

2010-12-07T12:21:00.003+08:00

Was working on something with Al-Amir last night. Hint,

Stay tuned! ;)

Thank You Irfan!

2010-11-26T00:13:00.004+08:00

Very sorry for the lack of posts on my blog. For one, I am flattered that many of you still come back judging by the hits on the counter.

Well work has been a handful for me nowadays. Ikea is understaffed, and overworked. Customer relations department is no exception. I'm already reunited with some of my old work buddies, Lorna and Oliver to name afew. Had good nights out with them so far. Kam Heong, and Nasi Lemak Babi to name a few. Alls gooood (Y)

Working in Smaland, I discovered that parents have very interesting names for their children. One parent named his two sons after his rock icon. Be it a Jon Bon Lim, and Jovi Lim. Another, inspired by Harry Potter, named his daughter Hermione! The next question, is whether or not I could somehow squeeze in John Mayer in a muslim name. Johan Mayar? :/

Right.

Ignore the last remark. thank you.

I'd hate to say this right, but I'm not sure why people's perception on Ikea workers are so bad. Especially those who come from the higher income sector of society assume that workers here at Ikea can't seem to get a job anywhere else, and thats why we ended up here.

I'm sorry sir, but I can't seem to comply to ignorant dafts such as you. Why? For one, I chose. to work at Ikea. Its a good place, with good people and the pay is good. I get to meet people, which I happen to enjoy in customer relations. So its not exactly a dead end job.

I'm starting to enjoy working in Exchange and Returns especially. No screaming customers yet, but I enjoy seeing a customer walking away with a smile on their face, thanking me by name.

Yes I enjoy it over there.

Plus, I think I've become honorary Godfather of Joanna's two kids Jeremy and Ally. Pictures up soon. They're like the dearest thing ever! :)

Back In My Yellow Shirt.

2010-11-16T23:53:00.004+08:00

I'm one week into my holidays. And bored to death. Pardon my long absence, its one of those long droughts of no creative output.

My exams went by alright. I noticed how much I know now compared to last semester though. Trust me it was right for me to fail those papers I did. I knew so much more this time around. My only wish is that I did enough to push my pointer up.

Good news is, that I'm heading back to Ikea to work during the holidays. I got news that they upped the pay to 7.50 an hour this time around. Which is a lot compared to the wages last time. But I'm sure there's gonna be a ton of work to be done and all. I'm getting my palm scanned at Ikea tomorrow. I think its a new system where you've gotta scan your palm as you're clocking in an out of work. God damn, this is so freaking Star Trek. HAHA :p

Its raya haji tomorrow. To all muslims, Selamat Hari Raya AidilAdha. Anyone going for korban tomorrow? I remembered how epic the slaughter was last year. It was my first time witnessing the whole ordeal, and it was an eye opener. Bloody hell was it bloody.

I noticed how much hard work it is to be a manual labor worker. Get this, I help to set up those christmas-y lights around my mom's pagola earlier. It was alot of hard work! You know the ones with long wires and sparkles? Yeah that one. Took me an hour to complete everything. Hurt my back too.

Other than that, I'm meeting my two favorite Macha's from RMC tomorrow. Both are in town for a few days. One of them is sailing about, and the other one is in the airforce. Here's to more updates? Maybe.

The Dolphin Massacre.

2010-11-03T07:37:00.003+08:00

Read an article on the dolphin massacre which happens in Japan every year yesterday. Downloaded 'The Cove' immediately after.

In a little town called Taiji, local japanese fishermen hunt down over 23,000 dolphins annualy. I'm pretty sure everyone knows of the international ban on whaling. What some of you may not know that dolphins, ultimately are whales too. They're from a family called cetaceans, which ordinarily translates to aquatic mammals.

Dolphins are acoustic creatures. Sound either attract, or repel them. How they are killed is that fishermen boats have this metal pole which they stick in the water. They'd hammer onto the pole which in turn creates this racket beneath the surface. Mind you, that I'm not talking about one or two boats. There's about 12 boats doing the same thing pushing passing dolphins into a cove off the coast of Taiji. Once they get the dolphins trapped in the cove, they'd set up nets and just leave them there for a couple of days. And come back, and harpoon the dolphins to death.

Imagine seeing the a sea of red. I kid you not, the water was red.

I'm not really sure why the Japanese really hunt dolphins. They justify it with "cultural" reasons, but lets take a good look at dolphins. I get why they hunt whales. Whales have relatively clean meat. But dolphins, are living toxic wastes. The mercury content in their meat, is off the charts.

In the 60s, mercury poisoning had another name. Minamata disease. Minamata is a town in Japan where the mercury poisoning was first detected. A factory was dumping high concentrations of mercury into the sea and the village people were affected by it. Pregnant women were the main concerns. Children were born with cerebral palsy.

But then I'm not saying that Japan is ultimately a bad country. Not everyone eats dolphin meats there. The majority of the population never heard of such massacre. Until the movie told the world what was really happening in Taiji.

Watch the movie yourself to really understand the movie. I mean, I started on this post barely 15minutes after the movie ended. Take it with a pinch of salt la. Wikipedia exposed some inconsistencies between the movie, and reality.

After all, not everything is real in Tinseltown.

Just Another Speck.

2010-10-31T22:17:00.004+08:00

Personally right, I don't think its fair to brand something that you do on a regular basis as YOURS. Catch my drift? Okay examples. For one, I'm sure there's a million other people who blog exactly the way I blog in the world. Okay, so maybe not a million cos you know, like my blog is different.

Get the point?

What I'm sayin is this. I'd very much like to say that this particular style of blogging is mine. But inevitably, its not. In our own delusional heads, human beings have the tendency to brand these things as ours. Like for instance, the way we dress.

I love wearing shorts. That doesn't mean I can get mad at anyone else who wants to wear shorts around me too. Or the fact that someone else is wearing the exact same thing I'm wearing. Lets be real. The shops we buy our clothes from, do not cater for us alone. So you have to understand that there are times that you'd just bump into people who'd wear the exact same outfit you are wearing.

You see, we strive to be different from everyone else. Its called human vanity. We want to be significant, in a world which has seen it all. I have curly hair for instance. I don't own the look. I was just lucky(or shall I say unlucky) to be born with such genetics. There is no way in hell can I ever justify to the whole world that I, Amirul Irfan was the trendsetter for curly hair. No way.

So just because someone else wore what you wore, doesn't give you the right to be angry. Or even upset for that matter. Because we all followed a trend somewhere. Its just whether or not we're willing to see that fact.

Lets not be selfish. Open your eyes, and come to grips with reality. We're all sea water foam on the surface of the sea. No one foam is different from the next.

Jaded Thoughts.

2010-10-29T00:31:00.007+08:00

If you had the most expensive diamond; so finely cut, the most beautiful one ever discovered by mankind, would you do everything in your power to keep it safe? Like for instance invest in a state of the art security system? I'm talking motion sensors, lasers and the whole nine yards.

Why?

I mean, after all it is a priceless piece of jewellery right? Who would leave it in clear sight where anyone can easily swipe it when you're not looking. If you had it, would you let people leave their dirty fingerprints on it as they gaze and touch this stone in jealousy and amazement?

No.

Because it's priceless. Because you don't ever wanna lose it. Thats too big of a gamble to take. Not allowing the benefit of the doubt, that just someday someone might steal it from you when you're not looking.

But the diamond wants to be seen! She wants people to drool in amazement at her beauty. Her gazillion karat shine. Her elegant shape perfectly crafted by the man upstairs. She doesn't wanna be hidden in a safe. She'd take distinction over security any day!

Lets put my analogy into logical context.

Ladies, don't you hate it when your boyfriend becomes too overprotective of you? How he wouldn't like it when you go out late at night to party out at the club? Or when he doesn't like it when you put yourself in a vulnerable situation. Vulnerable, to another guy's attention.

Here's the truth about guys being somewhat overprotective. Maybe we are afraid of losing you. Thats why we get upset when you do things behind our back. When you put yourself in the limelight. To be honest, men have lower self esteem than women. We're afraid that just maybe, with all the attention you get; you'd just finally get how awesome of a girl you really are who is worthy of better man than us.

To the extent that we don't feel worthy of being your man.

Think about it. Girls aren't the only insecure half in the relationship. Guys are too. We just mask it better than you do. By being all angry and overprotective.

You're only scared of losing things that matter the most to you. Like that expensive designer handbag mom bought for you, or your beloved car. So the next time your boyfriend is being overprotective, consider what I said earlier on, and give him a big hug and tell him that you love him. Because despite the restriction, deep down, he's just afraid that he'll lose you.

Funny story, I had a priceless Vietnamese ruby in my hands awhile ago. You can probably tell that I no longer have it. But hey, there's still alot of other precious stones to choose from. I just don't feel like I wanna experience the whole ordeal of having my ruby stolen again.

Sorry guys, the secret is out now. We were just too egoistic to admit that we're afraid of losing the person closest to our heart. Think about it ladies. Any truth in it?

4 Means Die.

2010-10-27T21:44:00.005+08:00

I think I'm one of those guys who worries too much about everything needing to be perfect. I don't like it when things don't go as planned. I don't appreciate hiccups. Imma die of stress one day.

Exam Stress : Constitutional law paper tomorrow. Its really hard you see, because sometimes even with the statute allowed inside the exam hall. You'd sometimes go blank due to the pressure and panic of reading a really tough question. Indeed, it is a killer subject.
A New Phone : My phone's earpiece isn't working. I can't listen to the other person speaking without going to speakerphone. And thus, I need to buy a new one. Dad's helping out, but I've got my eyes on the Nokia 5800. Twitter, and foursquare purposes mind you.
Financial Constraints : Which brings me to the next reason. I'm running out of cash. I've made travel plans to go to the uk. Its a self-paid expenses trip. Parents ain't paying for anything. So I ain't got much cash to spare, and now I have to buy a new phone too?
Personal Issues : Conflict of interests, likes/dislikes, trustworthiness of the people around me. Not to forget the terhegeh-hegeh part. I just can't be the guy who doesn't give a damn.

Honestly, I think I miss the idea of companionship, more than the real thing.

Hello, Stranger In The Mirror.

2010-10-27T00:57:00.005+08:00

Its so easy to observe the people around you and condemn their flaws. So easy to judge the type of person they are based on how they look and the way they dress. Too short of a skirt, and she's a skank. Smelly body odour, and that cute guy you met at the mall has terrible personal hygiene.

If there's one thing I learn, is that looks or appearances can be deceiving. Take the earlier examples I gave. Maybe the girl had nothing else to wear. Maybe the boy just finished a futsal game and was rushing so he didn't get the chance to freshen up before meeting you.

Then again, you should never judge a person by the one trait that sticks out. Always look for cluster signs on whether or not he/she is a bad person. A douchebag, may dress well, say the right things, but ultimately; still a douchebag. Look closer. Look at the things he says. How he says it. Is there an element of sarcasm? Attitude perhaps? Does he look you in the eye? Is he sincere?

All these things should be taken into consideration before you ever judge someone. Oh speaking about judging people, right. I know there's this one person everyone can't really judge well. Or should I say, refuse to judge. Who is it? Easy.

The person living inside the mirror.

You see, judging people is alot like pointing a gun. So much easier pointing a loaded gun to other people rather than point the nozzle of that .45 to your temple and squeeze the trigger. Listen to the gunshot just a fraction of a second before you drop dead, brains all over the place.

So allow me to be the first to start judging myself before any of you can. For one, I hate unplanned road trips. And not knowing which direction to go, so I'm pretty much relying on directions coming from a text message or the other person on the phone. That really ticks me off. Like I mean really. You can tell if I start breathing fast, and silently adjusting my grip on the steering wheel, muttering inaudible words. Yes thats me behind the wheel of a car when I'm pissed. Telltale signs that I'm pissed. So now you know.

Other than that, I can be really mean to you if you tick me off. Sarcastically of course. I like asking a rhethorical question, and cut you off just before you answer it, and then answer it myself. Yes, I know that's really mean. Takes alot to tick me off, but when I am. Sorry la. You had your chance.

And number three, it grinds my gears when I put alot of effort on doing something and not be credited for it. I don't ask for much, a pat on the back would suffice. Maybe a return of the favor sometime in the future? There are few people in the world, that I'd really make an effort to do things with, and a half-hearted effort on your side breaks my heart.

So thats three horrible things about me, which I can tell.

Try to judge yourself first before passing the baton to someone else. So that way atleast you know where you're standing. Maybe that'll make you a better person? Just sayin.

Road Rage.

2010-10-14T21:47:00.004+08:00

I read about this fun fact on twitter earlier today. Malaysia has the best roads in the region, but the second worse drivers after Indonesia. Not really pleasant to hear ey?

I think the one thing that Malaysian drivers lack the most besides the ability to automatically wear the seatbelt the minute you enter the car, use all your mirrors before taking a turn, and overtake on the left lane; is courtesy.

Courtesy in the form of having proper ethics on the road. It doesn't necessarily have to be in the form of always giving way to pretty girls on the road(well I do that once in a while ;D), or hogging the road if you're slower than the car behind you in the right lane.

What I'm talking about is a simple thank you when someone gives you the right of way even though it wasn't yours to begin with. And its not much of a hassle to do it too! A simple raise of your four fingers on the steering wheel, and even mouthing "thank you" does the trick! And if you wanna go the extra mile, smile!

I'll tell you why it goes a long way. The amount of anger on the road is bad enough when you have selfish drivers jumping the que on the U-turn lane at the traffic light thus creating an unnecessary traffic jam. A simple thank you, does alot to reduce this anger.

If someone smiles at you, there is no doubt in your mind that you should smile back. Thats my logic in this. You do nice things, and people do nice things back to you. Karma on the roads. Thats what I'm talking about. When you're mood improves on the road, I believe that your driving attitude changes too. You'd drive safely, less reckless and would make the road a much safer place to drive.

I try to express my gratitude on the road to drivers who let me into their lanes, give me the right of way on a narrow street. I don't lose anything in the process. I feel better too, cos 90% of the time, the other drivers respond with a smile or a raised hand to acknowledge your gratitude. Is it really too much to ask for?

Smile on the road, and the only fingers you should raise, are the four fingers on your steering wheel to signal a thank you. Trust me, it'll work wonders :)

Here's to a better attitude on the road!

Through The Eyes Of A Realist.

2010-10-11T21:59:00.004+08:00

The most universally popular misconception, is that all guys are heartbreakers. All guys cheat on their girlfriends, or leave their girlfriends for big breasted bimbos or model looking girls.

I won't deny the fact that this is a normal occurance in today's society. That people would break up over the stupidest shit they can think off. My partner has poor hygiene. My partner can't cook. My partner sucks in the sack.

But I somehow think that women, in particular have better publicists compared to men. Hear me out here. Whenever guys are the victim of such occurance, it will be so low-key that no one really knows about it until the guy speaks out. But when a girl got hurt. Oooh daaamn. The gossip starts here, and it never ends.

The popular belief is that whenever a couple break up, its always the guys fault. And of course, girls would side on their broken hearted girlfriends and try their best to console them. And when guys are the victim of such break-ups, they don't really have people who'd back them up. His bro's would probably take him out for drinks, or have a good time. But thats the end of it.

I don't think this is really fair. Guys have feelings too. They're not made of stone. They're just not too keen on showing that side of them because it suggests weakness. Well, I for one am an exception to the above statement. I have my whole archive to show you that I'm the exception. I was a true believer.

To those who actually are genuinely douchebags and assholes right, sometimes its genetics but most of the time, its usually due to undergoing a bad experience in love in the past which left a permanent scar.

And this growing trend is used in so many Hollywood movies. Look at movies like Hitch, and the Ugly Truth. The charismatic playboy wasn't always an asshole who could sweet-talk his way into a girls pants. He was first the innocent boy who believed in pure unconditional love. And got his heart yanked by his then-girlfriend, which in turn triggered the downward spiral fall to the person he now is.

I can name you a dozen guys who were the initial victims. Who are still afraid to get their hearts broken so much, that they don't believe in the idea of a monogamous relationship. Who ultimately become sucky-boyfriends.

Will I go down this path? Of being an unbeliever in the idea of a relationship? I can tell you straight up that,

The waters suck.
and I'm tired of being the terhegeh-hegeh one who has to do everything to keep things going.

In my humble opinion, it takes a certain degree of maturity to actually commit yourself to a real relationship. You have to have the right mindset on what you actually want to achieve in this institution called a relationship before considering to commit. If you're not ready then don't commit at all.

I've had my fair share of heartaches. But what else is new right? Marriages sometimes end in divorce, family members die, but we still have to keep our chin up and continue the journey of life.

The human heart isn't to be fooled around with. You don't tell someone you love them and suddenly walk away when times are rough. Beats the whole purpose don't ya think so?

Being in love is first believing that love exists. And mind you, even science can't prove true love exists. That the feeling can be quantified. And if you can't quantify something in science, it does not exist. So if a heartbreaking first experience is living proof that love doesn't exist, than tell me how a person can ever believe in love?

Can you answer? No. Why? Because its way easier to pull the trigger, than having to stay and explain.

Hows that for motherfucking food for thought?

Go Jump Off A Bridge Will Ya?

2010-10-11T00:20:00.003+08:00

I dream a world where people would accept eachother's indifference instead of alienating the black sheep. Being different doesn't necessarily amount to a bad thing. It adds variety to the mix. Like how an artist would choose multiple colors to express emotion on his canvas instead of a dull color.

But sadly, thats not the world we live in today. The world we currently reside in, alienates these poor minorities. Be it racially, financially, or any way possible that you could segregate each other from.

So you preach about equality, not wanting to be treated badly by people surrounding you, yet you don't walk the walk. Lip service, is boasting at its finest. You wanna see ethnocentricity? Thats exactly what it is. Making fun of others who are simply different than you.

The man who considers himself alpha all the time, comes off as beta to everyone else except for himself. His ego keeps his company, but if he thinks long enough, he'd probably notice how small he actually is. So don't freaking cock-block others who in your delusional head, think you're better than them.

No one can possibly be right all the time right? Thats why we have diversity.

Its funny how everyone else is at fault for being an asshole to you and suddenly you're not accountable to the fact that you're being an asshole to others.

Man, aren't you a douchebag.

The Stars Allign For Us.

2010-10-04T21:18:00.005+08:00

I find it somewhat mindblowing that horoscope personalities are rather spot on. Screw the daily bullshit they 'predict' about your day, thats pretty much nonsensical mambo-jumbo some 50year-old spinster made up in the office.

No offense.

I make my own luck, but it doesnt hurt to know that there's some cosmic play surrounding the people you meet everywhere. How people of certain sign's can or cannot get along together!

Being a Leo, I have some traits which all Leo's are perceived to have. Number one, being the raging temper I have from time to time. Number two, the stubborness of a mule. Number three, excessively sensitive when it comes to criticism. Number four, intelligent and motivated(I'D WISH) Number five, Leo's would dress to make and impression. Number six, oh it says that Leo's make really good lawyers too! :D

Compatible matches include Aries, Gemini, Libra and Saggitarius.. Just thought imma add that since we're on the topic. Teehee ;p

But then again, this shouldn't be taken seriously. Cos at the end of the day, He sets the ongoing events whic occur in our life, and not some astrology pattern. But you have to admit, it does lead to an interesting argument no? Check your own horoscope personality if you wanna see for yourself.

I've never done this before, but here it goes..

" Hey there, whats your sign?" ;)

Okay, Here's The Plan.

2010-10-03T21:17:00.004+08:00

I really miss Al-Amin. Its been 3 weeks since he left for Birmingham for his degree, but bloody hell it feels like a freaking lifetime. Amir flew to London a few days ago, and they met up. Man, was I jealous.

Then it hit me. What if;God-willing that is, I come visit him since he's already there. I mean yeah, the whole idea of travelling really appeals to me now. The first and last time I was on foreign land was in 2003 when I went to New Zealand with my family.

The UK, sounds like a good idea.

So this is the plan. Imma start saving money for this trip, and InsyaAllah, by this time next year. I'd have enough money to go see him. And I'm sure Amir wouldn't mind taking a week off to join me there right?

Man, I'd love to go see Abbey Road Studios where the Beatles recorded many of their hit singles. Take a stroll in their parks where Jack the Ripper stalked his victims. God damn. The possibility is endless. Food and accomodation would be easy since Amin is cooking after all. We could always eat in, and probably bunk in his room a few nights to lessen the expenditures.

But going there would require some serious abstinence. Why? Due to the nature of my spending pattern, I'd have to say no to alot of things I really wanna get for myself. For one, is a new phone since mine is all cellophane taped and shit. Shopping for new outfits etc.

Think about it. I can proudly say that I travelled at my own expense rather than have mom and dad pay everything for me.

Maybe its a blessing that I now have to only worry for myself.

Here's to a new beginning.

You Were Meant For Me.

2010-10-03T12:13:00.004+08:00

This is probably the last vid I'd ever post about you. I couldn't help but tear while listening to the lyrics.

All the best to both of you.

I promise to stay out of your atmosphere now.

Same old story, not much to say, Hearts are broken every day.

I Can't Save You, If You Don't Let Me.

2010-09-30T22:39:00.005+08:00

Its so much easier to make ties rather than to maintain them.

All it takes is a simple smile, a warm hello, and a friendly handshake. Voila! Hello New Friend. From there onwards, the possibility is simply endless.

Its the basis of all friendships. We all have an attraction factor we look for in potential friends/partners all around. You can deny all you want, at the end of the day its all physical attraction at first. No really. The very physical attraction that made you even want to say hi, and get to know the person better.

Be it, a pretty face, a smile which lights up the room, or even eyes so irresistable that you can't help yourself but get lost in them. Personal experience much? HAHA.

And that is when you start to single out their personality. Small talk does wonders in social situations. You share common interests, or detestation with the target person. if Personally, I'd have better relations with a person of the opposite sex rather than guys I meet. But at the end of the day right, you ask yourself what happened to Miss So and So, or Mr John Doe?

I'll tell you what happened. Neither one of you seem to remember that friendships require alot of tender loving care. You simply forgot to call eachother up just to say, "hi lets catchup over coffee." Yet another personal reference. Teehee. Ultimately right, its when you keep the fire blazing by soaking it with gasoline every once in a while is when the whole attraction factor comes to play.

You ask yourself, since we both enjoy eachothers company lets take this to the next level. See what just happened? All great relationships start from the best friendships. A combination of interests, differences, and a whole lot of effort to start the initial fire.

Bear in mind, that its not a one way street. Chemistry does not appear out of thin air, it has to be made. You have to first search for a common interest that both of y'all can constantly latch onto to keep the fire going. Because when it dies, so does the friendship. The frequent phone calls reduced to text messages, reduced to even shorter ones with just "ok". True story mate.

If I care enough about someone, I'd be on the front foot and just exert myself into his/her life. thats just the way things are with me. Its when I stop calling, you'd know something isn't right.

I can't build a fire if you keep blowing out the tinder.

For The Record.

2010-09-28T22:46:00.006+08:00

You know what I hate most about being in an institution where decent looking people have potty mouths?

Wooops. I think I just gave it away.

There's the popular malay saying that you should never..

"jaga tepi kain orang"

And the popular English saying is,

"let bygones, be bygones."

So, why the fuck.. (I made it easy for you because I too, am bilingual) would anyone who is proud enough to call themselves a law student, but too stupid to be a decent human by ignoring both the proverbs above. Thats like, being stupid in two different languages. Awesome ey?

You wanna know what happened in Kuantan? I'll tell you straight up.

I have friends, who were like family to me. We vibrated at the same frequency, we look out for eachother, and we loved eachother. We do things together all the time, and unfortunately had a very distinctive name. We were called the Lemon Tree's for god knows what reason.

No we did not choose our friends, as if you wanna hang with us it was all good. No you don't have to send in your daddy's paycheck so we could see how rich you are prior to hanging out with us.

Yes we spoke English. Yes we indeed talk about fashion and all that.

Does that make us any more or any less human than you? Absolutely Not.

That just makes us different.. from you.

If you say we're stuck up, we're not the ones pulling faces the moment we enter the room. No. That was you guys. You dumb motherfucking hillbillies. Whoops.

For the freaking record right, my dad's been retired for over 10 years now. If you do the math riiiight, not really rich larr. Or shall I point the obvious? For arguments sake, I'll do it anyways. 0 monthly income. ZERO. If I were to get a nickle for everytime my dad got his paycheck for the past 10 years; I would still have nothing. Not much innit? ;)

Grow up. You're 20 years old. Grow a pair of balls, and take a look around. You're not in a place where gossip triumphs the truth. No need to bring out the past(plus juicy false details, of course) in a new place and spread negativity all around.

If You Don't Wanna Love Me.

2010-09-27T19:17:00.004+08:00

Personally, the only real music I listen to are the ones played live. No offence to all you techno-beat junkies all around. But heck, this is the shit. These are the kind of songs that you remember for a long time.

A wise man once told me, that If you can't be the frontman, then linger in the back.

You'd rather blow out the lights, you can watch it all fade.

Friendly Reminder.

2010-09-16T19:02:00.006+08:00

A quick one. I've noticed this growing trend of publicity seeking folks chirping on my cbox. I'd like to remind you, first of all thank you for the nice compliments, but I'd prefer my blog to be ad-free.

Geddit?

For the time being, the chatbox is removed. I'll see how it goes and reconsider whether or not things are better this way.

Don't Hurt My Pride, Like Her.

2010-09-11T23:59:00.005+08:00

I'm typing this post in my grandma's house as you read this. From a lousy desktop filled with a million softwares my little cousins downloaded, a flickering monitor, and slow internet.

No wifi for the past 5 days. I miss tweeting on my iTouch. Heh.

But well, thats Raya in Alor Setar people.

Complaints aside, Raya this year was nothing like last year or the last. I would like to say that I'm not in the raya mood, but I'm not sure why. Maybe because for once I feel super alone. Like seriously alone. My phone hasn't rang in almost 3days. Minus the long raya text messages that is.

I'm not really a fan of forwarded raya messages. I like the ones with a personal touch. Not something you forward to everyone in your phonebook. I know thats alot to ask for right, but hey maybe thats just me.

My second sister is raya-ing with her inlaws in freaking Pontian this year. HAHAHA. I feel so bad for her because she merajuk that none of us actually texted her, and when we finally did, we decided to rub it in with our grandma's special dishes :D teehee.

My raya consisted of food and duit raya. My grandma has this badass ayam kuah kuning as we would call it. No brainer for why its called that la kan? So I ate. And ate. And ate somemore till I can't eat anymore. haha. And duit raya. Wait, what duit raya?

Love is more than just holding hands.

I Dream Of Ways To Throw It All Away.

2010-09-08T01:59:00.009+08:00

I haven't really had the time to write long blogposts nowadays. Been rather occupied with my friends. I mean, its not like I have other things to occupy my time right?

Here's a lil something by John Mayer. Gravity, done acousticly. Nicely done John.

To all muslims, Happy Eid Mubarak. In the spirit of Eid, here's another random thought. Asking for forgiveness just for the sake of Eid, is nowhere near a sincere apology. Personally, why wait for that one day in the whole year, when apologizing on the other 364 days has the exact same effect?

Don't agree? Prove me otherwise.

Oh Gravity, stay the hell away from me.

Guilty Until Proven Otherwise.

2010-09-02T01:44:00.004+08:00

Question: How do you justify an act which is morally, ethically and logically wrong?

Answer; Simple. You just can't.

Justification: despite how hard you try, despite all the bullshit you can thrust into your argument on how at the end of the day, a stakeholder would be better off by that act, would be hanging on loose threads.

More Justificiation: Simple logic really. The Machiavellian belief of the ends justifies the means, is a wishy-washy way to justify your case. This very principle in laymen's term basically means that you can do anything be it good, or bad to achieve an end which you THINK its right.

Note the bolded word. Mind you that is what YOU think. Nicollo Machiavelli was a brilliant man. He had influence, he had power and he had respect. Convince the millions of people around you that what YOU personally think, is the just decision.

At the end of the day, you'd end up looking like a fool, a bitch, a bastard, an asshole, or any profanity in the english language they presume fit your actions.

You take the high road. Think about the people whom your actions would affect. Be it someone important, nor is it just someone you just met. See how they potray you in their eyes. Not yours. Because, it doesn't really matter what you think of yourself. At the end of the day, if the people around you look at you and shake their heads, hah. You'd have nerves of steel to say you did the right thing.

Did something you can't justify lately?

2010-08-31T21:06:00.005+08:00

I tried doing what the first song told me to do. Sadly I was holding on to a hand which wasn't even trying.

The second song is virtually impossible to achieve. Especially at this point of life.

"Didn't they say we were the lucky ones?"

Maybe we were once.

How The World Looks Like From The Ground.

2010-08-30T04:43:00.003+08:00

Lets get right down to business. Quotes like :

"its better to have loved and lost, than to not love at all"

and

"kalau jodoh, tak kemana."

is a sad excuse after breaking up. You tell that to yourself so you'd feel better about yourself. Someone tells you, ah its their loss. Thats the biggest pile of bullshit I've ever heard.

You wanna move on. But you can't. You thought you were standing on your own, when some guy smashes your kneecaps with a baseball bat and you scream on the floor. No one hears you, why? Because you're all alone.

Be sad. miserable. dejected. sorrowful. cry your eyes out. As long as you can. Because thats the only thing which tells you you're human. That what you felt was real. And you believed it with your whole heart. That is living proof that there isn't a switch in your head which you can simple flick on and off as if emotions are optional. Seriously, coming from a guy, this shit is real. Guys have feelings too! Spread the word!

You only feel pain because you knew you lost something dear to your heart.

Sorry for my pessimistic side seeping out. I don't think I'm even half the realist I proclaim myself to be.

A Notable Blog Written At 3am.

2010-08-30T03:10:00.005+08:00

just when life decides to throw you a bone, another dog just wrestles it away from you. like right from under your nose.

waaaaow.

here's some no holds barred shit. getting kicked in the nuts, hurt. getting kick in the nuts in public, and being spat on while rolling on the ground,

priceless.

dude i'm going crazy here.

The Sinking FriendShip.

2010-08-29T20:54:00.004+08:00

Friends are people who you can rely on. They cheer you up when you're sad, they are bring you up when you're down. They'd clear their schedule because they love you like no other.

an asswipe of a friend who lies, manipulates and ignorant to all of the above can get that kind of attention, but not me. I tried once, twice but not thrice. I read between the lines. You know what that line is?

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to determine who are good friends.

and i'm pretty sure you just lost one.

you wanna be two faced? it takes two, to fucking tango my friend.

You Will Never Have My Rhymes.

2010-08-21T18:26:00.002+08:00

"My pride will keep me company, And you just gave yours all away."

Frequencies.

2010-08-21T15:28:00.004+08:00

Did you realized that things were so much easier when we were kids? Making friends was the easiest thing to do while growing up and when you get older, it becomes progressively harder to create solid relationships.

Back then, kids had only one thing in mind, which is having fun. And for that sole reason, is why socializing becomes child's play back then rather than it is now. You could've just met the kid 10minutes ago, and if you're playing a game of hide and seek you'd be best friends by the time the game ends.

My theory on this phenomena, is that people who vibrate at similar frequencies tend to be able to get along better than those who do not. By same frequencies, I mean the fact that they have similar interests and this common trait makes socializing a piece of cake.

In comparison to how as you grow up, your priorities in life change. If when you were kids, you only wanna eat candy, watch tv, and play tag. As you grow up, you get exposed to more things which would branch your interests even more. Hang around party people long enough and that curiosity would eventually cause you to conform to your peers.

Its happened a million times.

Then you meet people who'd change your perception on life like on matters of love, money and friendship. You fall in love with some girl who ends up breaking your heart, then in the end you subconsciously create a bias on love. The idea of trusting anyone seems so impossible, because of that one experience which you did, caused you so much heartache that it makes falling in love again a farcry.

My point in this matter is, as you age the experience you gain in life makes you more wary of the people surrounding you. Thus, with this experience, it makes it harder to attain new friendships. This is where the whole frequency thing comes to play. You automatically discard the presence of anyone who vibrates in that frequency which you despise.

Curiosity killed the cat, and the person who you thought you were.

20th Year.

2010-08-08T08:43:00.003+08:00

Officialy not a teenager anymore! Come today, i'll be in my 20s. haha.

Had a birthday dinner gathering at Amin's place last night. What was on the menu?

Fettuccine Carbonara.
Roast Beef.
Buffalo Wings.
Caesar Salad.
Lamb Kebab.
Apple Tarts.

Saying that Al Amin is a good cook, is an understatement. He got thumbs up from each and everyone of my guest's who came by and itu pun he said it was all cincai cooking! I love you Al Amin, things would not have been the same without you :)

After the huge feast, we had a karaoke session at the house as well. Twas abit hard to get the ball rolling for everyone to start singing out loud in the beginning, but after afew songs, people started loosening up and sang their hearts out!

For those who came, thanks for celebrating the end of my teens and into the real world. I love you guys :)

May I enjoy this new start of mine.

Reality.

2010-08-04T23:29:00.004+08:00

"I tried to be a decent man in an indecent time."

Hows that for motherfucking food for thought?

Getting A Grip.

2010-07-24T12:31:00.002+08:00

I guess there's no use fretting over spilt milk right? But what to do. I'm still in repair. Not together, but I'm getting there.

I just noticed how when you're so used to certain things, you still do them even when its no longer there. It becomes a quote unquote addiction. You're not doing it because you want to, you're just doing it because you got used to it that it has blended in your system.

Its like how Spiderman feels when he puts on the black suit. Something just draws him out and he turns into a suave romeo compared to the shy Peter Parker. It wasn't really him being him. He just can't help it. He's just drawn to the power of the suit. The confidence he gets from it.

Its amazing.

Now its time for rehab I guess. Gotta ditch some old habits and start anew. From everything. Its not gonna be easy, it will take alot of abstinence, but hopefully i'll be able to pull through. Hey, whats the worst that can happen right?

Little did I know what the future has in store for me..

Jumper.

2010-07-22T19:17:00.004+08:00

You know whats my biggest disappointment since forever? Is knowing that my presence in someone's life meant absolutely nothing. That I was deadweight. That I was nothing but a bore. That not for one minute, I'm worth a real apology.

That every piece of memory shared with me meant absolutely nothing. I was only a measely destination in an already exciting passport. The one stamp which has been covered by every other destination.

Tell me how life is fair now.

Because frankly this is an alltime low. By any standards you may set it to.

Was I really that bad of a person? Did dedications meant absolutely nothing? Every picture posted, every sentence ever said meant absolutely nothing?

I guess I'm not worthy anymore. Lets face it. You'll never think of me. Your pride is worth much more than a loser such as me.

Dah la. I might just go jump off a bridge.

Hows that for being real?

You've Got Your Gun To My Head.

2010-07-16T23:04:00.004+08:00

Have you wondered if James Bond ever had trouble sleeping? I have and I'll tell you why. Despite his kick-ass lifestyle of having the British government pay for his lavish expenses, sleeping with gorgeous women, and drinking fine wine, he has to do the one thing that many of us tremble to the idea of it..

.. Pulling the trigger.

Thats the one thing I'm unable to do. Pull the trigger and yet, sleep soundly like a baby. Heck, Bond had his fair share of sleepless nights during Quantum of Solace with Jesper on his mind. Speaking of sleepless nights, I can't remember one night in the past week since I've slept soundly. Pretty hard to do so when you're head is on straight, but your mind's all over the place no?

Does that make me James Bond?

.. I'd wish ;p

Fortunately for James Bond, there's such a thing called Ambien.

Pulled any triggers lately?

World Stage.

2010-07-15T01:26:00.002+08:00

Was at debate practice today. Missed my Malaysian Legal System class at 6.30pm because I wasn't really up to the idea of studying right now. I woke up early to go for my contracts class, just to find out it was freaking cancelled. It was 10.30am so I pretty much burned some time at Old Town White Coffee in Shah Alam.

Not as good as the one we have in KJ though. haha. Just thought I might add that :p

Other than that I was 10 seconds shy of getting my car towed by the Shah Alam Perbandaran people. Fuh. I know the sign says its a tow area right, but like no one really takes those signs seriously. Until today. haha.

Got a 60ringgit parking ticket which I am not planning to pay for! haha. My business in Shah Alam, is in UiTM only. Nowhere else. So as long as I'm nowhere outside of UiTM, my car should be fine :D

Had lunch with Ilyas at KGNS tadi. And watched a movie with Zuhdi and Alice. She's outta my league? JYEAAH. I kinda feel you bro. I'm suffering from the same inferior complex to be honest. Ngeh.

Oh bloody hell debate was freaking haard. Shiiiit. Lost my touch already. We started off our British Parliamentary debates already now. Apparently there's quite a number of tournaments this semester. Hopefully, my form improves within the next few weeks.

Bad news is that we might be getting a new trainer in the form of Hafiz. Which is, bad news for all of us. We so dearly love Mr Masai and his sarcastic ways with us. Gah. Hopefully it doesn't come to that.

I'm trying to win tickets for World Stage this time around. A friend is selling, but why pay for something when you can get it for free right? But shit. I just tried for the past half an hour. FAILED.

This is definitely harder than it looks.

Tales Of The Mighty Tongue.

2010-07-13T20:21:00.003+08:00

I have this one law lecturer in uitm. He graduated at the tender age of 19 from an American university in governmental administration. Yes you heard me right. 19! :S Got his LLB, and eventually a PhD from IIUM.

He has served as a consultant to many countries including Maldives, Fiji, Timor Leste, Afghanistan and Iraq, advising them on their constitutional documents.He went on to draft the constitution of Maldives. Which is ultimately the highest law of the land. Pretty fucking awesome right? :D

He's the constitutional demi-god of Malaysia, I might say. His lectures are the ones I really look forward to. I mean, I pay attention in class for once! haha. He has this unique way of teaching that he sounds alot like a wise sifu teaching kungfu to new disciples. Narrating each experience with past examples.

Very wise I must say. And interesting! Mind you, constitutional law, isn't the most interesting subject in the whole course. He adds some really informative issues to what he's teaching to make the whole learning experience memorable.

He's quoted some famous examples, ie the Miranda Rights, and the Watergate Scandal from the US and managed to relate it to our subject. Many of which, students don't understand. Why? Its American for god sake. If you're a general knowledge enthusiast, you might really find his lecture extremely interesting.

The best part of which is his articulation of the english language. He's not malay btw. He's an immigrant from India with permament residency in Malaysia. Quite frankly, I would give an arm and a leg to get his mastery of the English language.

You see, speakers like Barack Obama, Martin Luthor King, and Tun Mahathir have this unique vibe surrounding them. Their control of the language, the vocabulary they possess, can make a simple story of them going to the wet market sound like the best experience in their life!

Yes they are wonderful orator's, and if God willing, I'd like to have that degree of control of language as they have. To be honest, I have this inferior complex to people with very very good English. I suddenly get tongue tied, or my vocab just goes down the window when I'm conversing with them.

A person's control over language and conversational skills tells alot about the kind of person they are. You'd win my respect hands down if you come across as a good conversationalist rather than trying to sound alpha all the freaking time.

No kidding.

The Aftermath.

2010-07-13T01:52:00.004+08:00

I don't really wear my heart on my sleeve. I self proclaimed my heart to be indestructible because I was flying high. The unthinkable happens, and you're left feeling like a freaking moron picking up the pieces of what used to be your "indestructible" heart. Note, sarcasm.

Life goes on yada yada yada. Yeah I don't really need people to say that things are gonna be okay, I know things will eventually be okay. Its the whole transition part which fucking sucks. I hardly use much profanities in my blogposts because well, to be frank I'm not one who'd drop Fbombs all the freaking time.

Tonight, I'll make an exception. I wrote a post earlier to describe how I felt, but some error erased the whole draft. And I'm too lazy to remember what I wrote about.

For now, I'll have to find a way to occupy myself the best I really can. I wanna go wallclimbing, but takde belay partner. I wanna talk to someone, but lately people turn their backs on me. And all thats left is me and my guitar. I can sooo relate to so many songs right now. Maybe poetry is a way out of this. hmm.

How am I holding up? Well, my self esteem, confidence is down the drain man. And that hardly ever happens to me. Always a first time right?

Game face Amirul, game face.

Crossroads.

2010-07-08T01:32:00.003+08:00

Had a long talk over dinner with my brother in law over my career options. Since I pretty much screwed up my first semester results, the impending nightmare of whether or not I would be able to practice law was clearer than ever.

Lets face it. I have to finish my 3 year Bachelor of Legal Studies with a CGPA of minimum 2.8 or else I wont be able to pursue my LLB. Then only I'll be in the running for chambering and so on.

He was pretty optimistic over it. He is a man whom I have great respect for. He has been with me for over a decade now. And has never stopped guiding me through life. He is that older brother that I never had. And I guess in a way, I was his younger brother that he never had.

Even if I wont be able to practice law, will definitely not mean its the end of the world. I mean, I have some other options lingering in my head. I once considered Journalism as a career choice. But if I do somehow end up in journalism, I doubt that I'll ever work locally.

Its like this dream of mine to travel while working. I mean, imagine me, a Times Magazine journalist? :O

EPIC SHIT.

Fingers crossed Amirul Irfan. It ain't over till its over!

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Lost.

2010-07-07T03:14:00.002+08:00

Only God knows why I'm put to this test. I'm not really sure why. I can't sleep, I'm filled with heartache, rage and and a mixture of love in the whole mix.

I'm not sure why. Its hard for me to sleep, I can't simply erase the year and a half which I was in through thick and thin.

And you, maybe you should consider the fact that you just got here.

But He has his divine ways of telling you something. Just for the time being, please be more specific. I can't bear to figure out things on my own right now.

Show me a sign.

A Thousand Clever Lines.

2010-06-27T17:54:00.002+08:00

Oh this song was the shit! Totally forgot about it till just now. HAH.

Another RMC Boy Leaves Us, Al Fatihah.

2010-06-25T02:12:00.006+08:00

I just got the news. Yet another kid died in RMC. You kids now ah. Aiyo.

When I was in RMC, there weren't any deaths in decades. Then they changed the whole RMC system. Instead of form2 intakes, they only took kids for 2 years in form4.

And it went downhill thereafter. I went through puberty in RMC. My voice croaked in those tender years in college. I was 14 and already living away from home. I learned about life the hardway. No one guided me through, it was literally hard work and pain.

Everything in RMC was all assumed to be understood by all. No one taught us. Experience literally taught us. That experience came in the form of lying face down after getting kicked in the stomach while doing really uncomfortable pushups on your knuckles. I'm not talking about your fists. Try interlocking your fingers together, and do a push up on your knuckles now. Yeah. Thats how it was. That particular pushup was known as the Hammerlight. God knows who coined the term, but it was the most painful, yet popular tool in the arsenal of a senior.

Everytime someone in the squad screwed up, all of us kena bambu! And the pattern was always the same. You'd see a few seniors sentry-ing at the corridor. All of us in a single file in the room. Fans, OFF! Then the dreaded words were spoken.

"FRONT SUPPORT POSITION DOWN!"

and soon after, "CHANGE TO HAMMERLIGHT CHANGE!"

someone would count the number of times we're going up and down. And when someone slows down, or cannot continue,the words..

"KOSONG KOSONG." Signifying that all of us have to start from square one.

Memang sabo betul la. You see, life wasn't easy for me! So stop judging my build and undermining my past as an Old Putera. I'll prove it to you that I can do this shit.

Woah. Strayed so far away from what I wanted to say. EHEM. Wait, lemme start over.

Where was I? Oh right. Form4 intakes. Yeah. The thing about changing the whole system, is that the whole sense of "I'm a senior, you have to respect me" bullshit comes into play. It was much easier for a form5 senior to make a form2 junior respect him than a form4 junior.

Common sense la. The age difference is only one year. Would you really call someone a year older than you 'Sir'? Exactly my point. Rebellion is an issue, thus infuriating the seniors. So they got carried away with their ragging activities.

See what the internet and movies does to you?

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

The Reality Of The 21st Century Teenager.

2010-06-24T17:09:00.001+08:00

Here's a post from Nina Azrah. I can't agree more on this. Enjoy!

You are now part of a society where Entertainment is the core religion; Lady Gaga is the priest, Hollywood is the Holy City and MTV channel is the Book of Eli.

Welcome aboard. You have entered the Entertainment Revolution, year 2010. This is the age where everything you think is real is actually superficial. Rhetorically.

Similar to any other revolution – corruption and ignorance are the guns and bombs of destruction. Previously, we have endured history of political turmoil with economical disruption, biological warfare and now a new weapon is found. Alas, you couldn’t have been less true – entertainment is both our lover and our enemy.

Music is a beautiful of art, undoubtedly. However in this new millennium of abomination, music has been molested into something rather disgusting. The lyrics portray sex, so-called love and more sex. The tune, despite being upbeat and catchy; is designed to serve one purpose and one only – seduce the people of the revolution to crumble into the industry of lusty pleasures. I’m not disrespecting anyone’s interests over here – because despite the crazy sales and the success of this type of music to go on the top charts, let’s face it – there are better musicians out there with better talents and better meaning and life brought in their music, more deserving to be called winners. Now all we see are music videos of people flashing their gaudy cars being flocked by bombshells.

With children who know nothing dominating the music industry - sweet and dandy at first but screwed up after a certain age - the cycle gets predictable and originality has submerged into the valleys of zero-creativity.

Similar to other forms of entertainment – movies and games, they too are forms of art. Properly enhanced, we’ll attain an effective solution of overcoming the yawn of boredom in repetitive education practices. Abused, you’ll get a society that is extremely ineffective. Of course, apart from being overly enthusiastic in activities which help you excel in sleep and food deprivation, or perhaps being more educated in pornography.

Everyone is slowly becoming just like everyone else. There is no distinguishable difference between a person and another. If a person seems to have an interest in something else than the two things that keep this revolution intact (which is sex and drugs), that person is a freak of nature.

No dope, you’re not cool. No sex, you’re gay. No alcohol, you’re a saint. Love reading, you’re boring. Low on the clubbing radar, you’re insecure. Muslim, terrorist. Hijab, conventional. Jew, scrooge. Malay, lazy. Nina, crazy. Chinese, another scrooge. Indian, long-winded.

The list of stereotypes could be a longer list, but you get what I mean, right?

Let’s flip the other side of the coin.

You’re raised in a good family with good moral values and education. Your teachers love you. Your parents are proud of the fact that you don’t have to be told to eat your vegetables. You finish your homework on time, you volunteer to answer questions in your class, and you do your chores perfectly. You’re a virgin in sex, drugs and alcohol. You’re basically a rebel of the Entertainment Revolution. Good for you.

In a classroom of various cultures and heritages, you seem like an angel. However, the person sitting next to you is the total opposite. He is an atheist but a follower of Lady Gaga and the holy lands of Hollywood. You find him profusely repelling. Not good.

Drugs and sex may lead to epileptic seizures and unwanted uterus expansion but with a self-righteous and self-proclaimed saint judging the sinful; you can actually be worse than the other. Humiliation would just cause more chaos. You may seem concerned about the moral values of another but your thirst to see that person fall is still quenched and your appetite for destruction is still filled. You are still content, even just a little.

The atheist thinks you’re not open-minded enough.

You think he is shallow and indecent.

You flaunt all your polished values and yet, you are still presumptuous enough to judge him. Where is the value in that?

Without realizing it, you might be a bigger monster after all.

You may think you’re cooler and more awesome than your seatmate who reads Sci-Fi every morning before class, but you’re still more ignorant. So after years of walking along the path of Entertainment Revolution, you decided that being ignorant is equivalent of being cool?

Centuries ago, icons like Socrates or Alexander the Great are highly influential for their wisdom and strategy, but today we look up to people in colourful costumes, dancing and singing to the beat of songs with little or no meaning.

You prefer Aristotle over Madonna and you’ll get a metaphorical tight slap from the modern world. So what if you have a knack for dead philosophers over a talented middle-aged woman with the energy of a teenage girl? Having an endangered interest doesn’t make you any less of a person.

There’s no point patronizing another, you’re still flawed yourself.

People will always be people. Whether you like it or not, you and I, both have personality warts.

My Poker Face.

2010-06-24T16:42:00.004+08:00

I don't appreciate deceit and dishonesty. There's such a thing as talking things over ya know? A and B has an argument, B hates A's guts, but still fakes the friendship. A knows but is shot down every single time the issue is brought up.

Why? Lying is so much easier to do than solving the problem head on. Denial sucks balls la friends. Why not just bury the fucking hatchet for once. A tells B, this is my problem with you. B does the same. You shake hands, settle the problem like adults for a change.

The problem is that A knows about B's grudge, but has no right to bring the matter up. And thus the cold war begins. Long messages sent to B replied with OK. Or maybe.

Yeah you're happy now, i'm happy for you. Wait till the tables turn, you ain't got pot of gold turns out to be scrap metal. Who you're gonna look for now?

You see, here's how you get someone to tell you the truth. You piss them the fuck off, and they'd spill whats truly on their mind. And that my friend, is Reality Check 101.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Waka Waka.

2010-06-23T02:14:00.002+08:00

I still can't get over that Astro commercial featuring Frank Lampard and Lionel Messi where Messi goes:

"in HD!" *lifts index finger*

HAHA. Like cannot go one. PLEAASEE MAAMAAAA?!

Well one thing thats different in this worldcup, is the annoying Vuvuzela's. Yeah those Afrikan horns which sound like buzzing bees. And its freaking annoying weh. Apparently its got higher decibles compared to a small jetplane! and Maria Sharapova's shriek after returning a forehand!! :S

and you know what, a fan actually tore her throat blowing that godforsaken horn. But I tell you la, the people who're selling it are probably rich by now. haha. EVERYONE'S BLOWING THE HORN DURING THE GAME!

and its ANNOYING. I can't imagine how the people watching in the stadium are taking it. For one, it pretty much deafen's the cheers and the jeers of the crowd. Heck, the Vuvuzela is even being made into an iPhone app! which I'm gonna get just for fuck's sake :p hahaha.

Question, which team am I supporting this time around? I'd have to say, Portugal. And no, I don't support Portugal just because of Cristiano Ronaldo. I've been a firm supporter of Portual since the 02 World Cup during the era of Luis Figo. And man, that team was epic! Oh, guess which country is on the verge of being blown to smithereens by North Korea? haha. 7-0 weh!

A lot of suprises this time around. The French just lost to South Afrika earlier, the mighty German's were humbled by starless Serbia which was very very suprising. I'm sure alot of people lost money in that game! ;) AHAH. I knowwww, gambling is prettty much illegal in Malaysia right now, buuuut. I know y'all still gamble ;D haha.

But don't worry, the Malaysian legislature are working on a new bill to legalise sports gambling, so chill! :)

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

And I Swallowed My Pride.

2010-06-22T01:14:00.002+08:00

You were my everything.

My Results Have Spoken.

2010-06-13T12:11:00.003+08:00

Got my exam results. It was no where near stellar. Borderline expelled to be exact.

Mom and Dad were still supportive of me. Dad especially. I'm not sure the news of my results would fly well with my eldest sister. She'll probably give me a strict curfew on the car, or might just take that priviledge away.

I have nothing to defend myself with. The results were justified, I knew what the outcome was the moment I stepped out of the exam room. I told myself that all I wanted to do was pass. I had 3A's, but that wasn't enough to boost my results up.

My law papers were all screwed up, except for Constitutional Law which I really had an interest for. The rest, Contracts, Torts and Malaysian Legal System all came down to Russian Roullete on which topics I should study on. My lecturer once told me that my answers weren't long enough. I din write alot for her to give me more marks. And I was like, what more do you want me to babble in my answer script?

I'm not the type of guy who would go round the bush just to give out the answer. I wanna say something, I'd usually go straight to the point. I don't bother writing three pages of crap when I can finish it in one and a half pages.

Now I've got my priorities set. Bullshit goes out the window. Starting this sem, a strict study timetable would come into effect. And for good measure, Imma print out copies of my exam slip and stick it everywhere around me to remind me how much I've failed myself, my parents and my career.

Its an uphill climb I tell you.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

A Life Changing Experience.

2010-06-10T19:19:00.003+08:00

I think working at IKEA has done me a huge favor.

Why?

Rewind the clock a couple of years, I was the guy who did not like children. AT ALL. Like seriously at all! I would find every excuse possible under the sun to escape situations where I had to babysit or for that matter, be around kids.

Take today for example. I was working at Smaland alone today for the first half of the day. And up till 6pm a total of 7 kids cried today. And who had the honor of keeping them quiet? MOI! (pronounce Mwa btw)

And guess what, I triumphed! MUAHAHAHA. I IZ AWESOMEZ! :D

So yes, I can proudly say that I'm better with kids now compared to before working at Smaland. Not to say that I enjoy their presence every single time. Don't get me wrong, but I've gone through situations when all I wanna do is wrap my hands around a kids neck and strangle them so they'd shut the hell up.

Yeah I've met my fair share of snitches among the kids, annoying ones who report every single thing they see to me. OVER AND OVER AGAIN. ERGH. Lets not forget their parents. HOH. I've had some major arguments with sarcastic parents. Hello, Smaland is free. Stop treating me like you're paying for this shit. I just did you a big favor by taking care of your monster of a child while you shop!

Just generalizing my experience for the month working there. Arab kids are the most annoying kids to take care of. They have a say in just about everything! Their favourite word in the vocabulary is WHY. Why this, Why that. ERGH. Parents who leave their children in would give every possible reason to not pick their kids up. Chinese parents are the hardest to convince that we're full. European/Caucasian parents are by far the most understanding among the parent's group. But there's an exception among them who tend to be sarcastic in the meanest way if they don't get their way.

So thats Smaland in one blog post. HAHA.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Stuck In A Moment.

2010-05-21T03:11:00.004+08:00

You know the saying, you don't wanna be caught in between a rock and a hard place? Thats kidsplay compared to the situation I'm facing right now.

There is no lesser evil. The lesser evil will hurt me either way.

I hate this.

I want things to be as simple as the way it is in movies. Why does happiness always come at a price? Why is love not an exception to the things life gives you for free? WHY.

No I wont signed it as 'Cheers' anymore.

There's nothing to cheer about.

FML.

IKEA.

2010-05-17T18:35:00.001+08:00

HELLO THERE! :)

I apologize for the long period of absence since my last blog post. Alot of things came along in the days before this blog post. Starting with, my new found job at Ikea! :)

HAHA. I was making fun of Mia when she was working there cos the uniform reminded me of bananas in pajamas. And now look at me now! haha. If you're ever around Ikea, do look for me at Smaland. Which is, the kids place if you wonder what Smaland really is. Yes its true. Amirul Irfan takes care of people's kids now.

I've grown fond of kids actually. I used to really despise those little monsters, but now I'm taking care of them! And boy those kids are constantly on crack, so running around after them is no odd picture in Smaland. Nevertheless, its been 4 days already with the job and I like it.

The working environment is kinda cool. The people I'm working with are really inviting and they don't really treat me like a new guy. Food is cheap too! In the coworkers restaurant, everything is 50% less. A plate of 10 meatballs cost only 5bucks! :D teeheeee.

The only downside is the parking la for now. I have yet to registered for season parking. So the past weekend, the parking was 10 bucks -__-'

Oh well, thats all for now.

Where dreams are made off.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

465.

2010-05-08T20:33:00.006+08:00

I think once in a while we need narcissistic wise asses around us to keep us entertained. Yeah, they're kinda annoying to be around with the whole "I'm so awesome" speech going on and on and on all day long, but narcissism can be hidden by humor though.

Take Tony Stark for example. If I din know any better, he's a total asshole. Not saying that he isn't though, he is an ass. But a real BAD-ASS!

No? Not funny? GAH.

FAILED.

HAHA. I mean seriously, he's probably the first superhero who does not possess any everyday superhero like quality! He believes the world revolves around him, he brags a hell lot, he's a manwhore, and very very eccentric. But then again, he manages to pull it off without people resenting him! Its the humor I tell you.

I watched Iron Man 2...

..TWICE.

teeheeeeheeee. and I liked it. I wouldn't compare which was better between the two, but I know it was money well spent. Scarjo definitely was awesome in the movie ;P

and 'somebody' got upset when I was watching the scene were Scarlett Johansson was changing in the car. Kena pukul pulak tu -_-' Boleh pulak tu nak marah! Ish. I was just watching, I din say anything pun. Hmf.

Let me remind you, this was the same person, with the other girls in the cinema who gasped out loud when they watched Jacob Black take his shirt off in New Moon! Ada hati nak marah pulak tu! -__-'

Did I physically abuse youuu? NOOOOOO. See how good I iz? :) kekeke.

And oh, today coincides with our 465th day together :) last year, I sent you 100 I love you's in a text message. I don't think a text message can accomadate 465 I love you's sayang. So here's my 465th day I LOVE YOU <3

Isn't she just adorable? <3

And I need you now.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

The Sad Truth.

2010-05-03T02:04:00.002+08:00

Personally, I don't think I'm taking my exams seriously. At the end of the day, I know I'm gonna regret my attitude, but till that day comes?

I had 4 freaking days to study for contracts. What did I do since?

Nothing.

Glancing through the pages, would be an overstatement to say the least.

God dammit.

Only tomorrow I'm getting the real notes. And thats that la. No internet tomorrow, no tv no nothing.

Ah if only it were that easy. Man that would be wishful thinking.

i'm just a lonely boy.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Balls? No?

2010-04-27T23:34:00.002+08:00

"Our arrows will blot out the sun!" screamed the Persian emissary.

"Then we shall fight in the shade." answered the Spartan soldier.

This is probably one of the best scenes in the battle of Thermopylae. Or if you've seen the movie, that scene where the Spartans were waiting for the Persians to attack them at the Hot Gates.

You see, the reason why the Spartans never fought with the bow and arrow, although with the benefit of safety in range and guaranteed kill, twas because it was considered an act of cowardice in war. The Spartan phalanx, made their kills as personal as possible as it was up close and personal.

Only a real man would wield a shield and sword and fight in battle. That was their take on war. You'd either get up close and personal and kill your enemy, or die with honor. They don't fear death, as it was considered a beautiful death if you die in battle.

My point in hand is that why hide in the safety of anonymity when you have a point to prove? You wanna stand for what you believe in right? Where's the pride of doing it with a smile on your face as everyone looks on?

I just saw this accquaintance of mine getting her blog spammed by irresponsible retards who said the most hurtful things ever imagined on her chatbox. So yeah, she is popular after all and it came with a price. You're under a microscope. The first slip up you make becomes a threat to national security. -_-'

And just like icing on the cake, the retard's did it under the name of; someone, a fan. Fucking cowards. Where your balls at? You wanna say something to someone, do the right thing by proudly saying it out loud. PUT YOUR FUCKING NAME DOWN and see whether you'd press enter.

You may hate me as I write shit like this here, but hey you came here. You wanted to see what I'd blog about and here it is. Signed, sealed, delivered. Thats my fucking two cents of the day.

I look at it this way, I have the integrity to sign it under my name. Tell me, would you do the same?

Oh fucking grow a pair for God sakes.

Hows that for food for thought?

Yeah I'm still around.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

The Inevitable Ass(S).

2010-04-24T12:18:00.005+08:00

Personally, I find bad english irritable. Well, it's not like I hate the person whose wrongfully using the language or whatever no don't get me wrong, allow me to illustrate.

It's like that itch on that part of your back where you just can't reach to scratch with your hands. It's definitely not a sin. Well, perhaps an academic sin to lecturers or divine lovers of the language. HAHA. Okay, ignore the sarcastic remark.

For me, it's just an itch you just can't reach. Because there is no way you can actually correct the person without the other person really taking your remarks personally as an insult. Like what happened earlier. HAHA.

It's really basic mistakes. Differentiation between plural and singular verbs la mostly. Placing the letter (s) where it is not needed.

That(s) mean.
Shit(s)
Crap(s)

These are my top three itches. If you catch my drift. That(s) mean? Seriously? God. That literally translates in BM as itu's maksudnya. Get it? Mana ada itu's maksudnya. Its just itu. Thus, the same in english as That means. I'm not hosting an english lecture here on my blog, but this is a fucking epidemic! And someone has to bloody point it out publically at least. I guess, I'll bite the bullet then.

Shit(s) and crap(s). Question number one, can you actually count shit and crap? You put the letter (s) only when you can count shit. Like, 3 pairs of shoe(s), 5 luxury car(s) and so on. Catch my drift? You can't count shit. Because they're simple uncountable. A basic logic would be its because not all shit are the same shape. I mean, did you know there's 7 categories for stools? HAH. Go ask Prof Wikipedia! ;P

You know the funny story regarding the placement of an unnecessary (s)? Gets me everytime. It was one of those rock concerts in the 90's by Ella. She just finished a number, and the crowd was going wild. And then, dengan muka mat confirmnya, she screamed to the crowd..

"ARE YOU ENJOYS!??!?"

And the rest, as they say, is history.

Lets not get caught in an Ella moment shall we?

Personally I might add, good grammar, is sexy. Among the long list of other things which I consider sexy. haha.

I would like to point out as an endnote, this post has nothing to do with anyone surrounding me. It is just something that me and my friends always laugh about all the time. Oh, do forgive my incorrect english terms if there are any. I ain't good with all the verbs, nouns and whatnot.

In my place.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

The Ballad Of Amirul and Amirah.

2010-04-22T02:17:00.006+08:00

My darling girlfriend has just left for Australia. Or as the old folks would refer to as Ostrolia.

HAHA. Gah. No laughing matter! :( I'm saaaaaad. She's only coming back on the 1st. Sigh. I miss you oredi la sayaaaang.

Well regardless of whether or not she's here, I'd like to point out to that little anniversary box I have on my sidebar.

Well, if it already changed sayang when you see this, I want to point out that this is the exact day it happened.

I LOVE YOU ;)

teeeheeeheeeee.

Not bad for this ~~retired~~ hopeless romantic huh? ;)

Lets get together and feel alright <3

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Death In The Opposite House.

2010-04-20T00:47:00.002+08:00

My granduncle passed away today. He was my grandma's youngest brother. I believe he's the 10th child in the family. We all called him Tok Mamak Teh. Well, throughout most of everyone's life, you're close to family in your early years, and you start drifting apart as you reach maturity and teenage life.

I was no exception. He had a son whom is technically, my uncle. Though I'm 2 years older than him. haha. Maiz as I referred to him while growing up. We played together at age 7, or 8. Then drifted apart for 10 odd years. The last time I met him was at Rasta one fateful night.

He looked at me, he recognized me I stood up and extended a friendly handshake. We started questioning eachother on who knows who. I asked him whether he remembered me, and he said yes. Then he did the same thing, but DUH yeah I knew him. So we started playing the name game. Whats my name? We both questioned. HAH. I won here. He forgot my name :p haha. Played the bluff well as if I've forgotten his name. Ngeehhh.

We got reaccquainted and said our goodbye's. I din see him earlier when I came to his house for baca Yassin. His father was in the living room, wrapped in the white cloth. Sigh. Nothing is more heartbreaking than to see people crying over a death in the family.

Come to think of it, my father was talking about how my granduncle was only a few years older than my dad. And how they got married almost in the same year. The big question arose on whose next in the family? I was worried about my father. He has a heart condition and is literally living off his meds.

Why? I pity my grandma. She has 9 other siblings, 4 of which passed away last year. Tok Mamak Teh is number 5 to leave us. She is the second child. And thats the thing about outliving your other siblings. Seeing them go first is something you and I will never be able to understand. God, I wonder how my parents dealt with my late brother's death. For those who did not know, he passed away in 1989 at age 13. Thats 7 years younger than my age. Which means I outlived him for 7 years.

There were alot of people who came to the house to offer final respects to my granduncle. The former Home Minister Datuk Seri Syed Hamid Albar dropped by. As well as Tun's wife came over too. I wasn't around for the funeral proceedings though. Had to study for my upcoming finals on Wednedsay. I am dead meat.

But I wonder who would come to my funeral. Ever wondered how yours would be like?

White roses on my grave.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

The Best Laid Plans.

2010-04-12T19:21:00.003+08:00

Finals are coming up reaaal soon. First paper being Malaysian Legal System on the 21st. And I'm petrified. Classes are pretty much over except for a few subjects which the lecturer wants to give exam hints and tips.

My biggest hurdle in staying at home is that, studying is really really hard. I'd usually have my iTunes on playing my songs, but with that comes facebook, and twitter and thats too much of a distraction. And I ALWAYS give in to my temptations.

So I came up with a fullproof plan to actually solve this problem once and for all!

And my best laid plans, includes the purchase of an iPod Touch. :D

Okay, this is why. When there's internet, there's facebook and msn. But since I usually study with music, the iPod touch fits the bill perfectly. To be frank, I'd prefer an iPhone, but due to the fact that I don't have the cash to do so and iPod would suffice. With the iPod, I'd get to use a simpler version of Facebook, and still listen to the music and all.

And I've even pre-purchased my applications. haha. I made a mental note on the must have applications. Because the only reason why the iPhone rocks is the abundance of useful, yet cool applications they provide. Some are free, but some are also paid. I think what you pay for is justifiable by the usefulness of the app. Like they say, nothing in life is free right? ;)

The biggest criticism of the iPod touch was of the battery life. I beg to differ because with a full charged battery you can have 6hours of usage with wifi. Music wise, the battery is awesome la! Speaking of wifi, the National Broadband Initiative, which would lead to the practicality of this awesome gadget.

So right now, I just have to finish my finals, and work for a couple of months to get this one. I'm abit fussy on the specs so, imma splurge some cash on this. I'm planning to get the 32Gb model, which is about 1.1k I think. And I don't really buy gadgets often, so I've pretty much made up my mind on this one.

I think with this, I can study a teeny wee bit better. HAHA. God I've been yapping about getting an iPod for over a year! :p

Finals weh finals next week! :(

The day you went away.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

We Always Judge A Book By Its Cover, Don't Deny It.

2010-04-06T22:33:00.007+08:00

Is there any truth in the title? Or are you still in denial? ;) haha.

There's an unwritten rule in life that with certain priviledges in life, there is a social contract which you have automatically signed to enjoy that luxury. Its not really compulsary, however people see you in a brand new light after that fateful moment.

Here's an example. You see a Cherry Red Ferrari drive past you and stop just a few meters from where you are. And you and your buddy stare in awe at the beauty of the machine and wonder what the owner looks like. Is he good looking? Maybe its a hot chick? You start putting bets on whose right.

Then came the moment of truth... Both of you just lost.

The guy stepping out wasn't executive looking at all. Nor was she a hot chick. He's some hobo looking guy who keeps scratching his butt every 10 seconds. Disappointed? Yes.

See what I mean? Certain things require you to present yourself in a particular manner. Like how you'd expect someone who rides a Harley on the road not to ride or dress like a rempit. You catch my drift? Yeah, there's like a certain degree of class that comes with seeing a guy riding a Harley. You salute these guys, you respect them.

But when you see people who act contrasting to how they present themselves to the public, what is your first expression? Me, I'd go WTF.

I'll ask you again. Am I right? Yes, no? Hi five? ;)

Don't worry, it'll be our little secret.

I'll be there forever and a day.. Always.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

A Close Call.

2010-04-05T19:19:00.006+08:00

I had one of my scariest driving experience this morning while driving to UiTM. My law lecturer planned a trip to the Parliament today. We were to be in UiTM by 8am. So this morning I had to wake up extra early to head to class and you know how everybody hates Mondays? Yeah that includes me.

I swear, I was still groggy driving on the road. The roads were pretty clear until I got into Shah Alam. Thats where I experienced my near-accident incident. Hey, that rhymes! haha.

A car overtook me on the left. I was already WTF-ed when I saw this huge ass bumper sticker on that Waja. It reads,

WALIA ON BOARD

If you have a confused face plastered on yours right now, thats the exact same expression I had on me at that point of time.

In my head, I first thing that came to mind is probably the owner happens to be a relative of TV3's Karam Singh Walia? What other Walia then?

I was probably driving 60 and I din realize the cars in line in front of me. The traffic was at a halt and I was going wayyy too fast reciprocal to the car infront of me.

And I hit the brakes as hard as I could. Heard my tires screetch, and felt the brakes lock as I skidded forward. Stopped, just in time but that gave me quite a fright. Adrenaline? I was lucky Tito wasn't hurt in the process.

I have yet to hit anyone on the road, and I intend on keeping it that way. But boy, was that a close call.

Come home.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

I'll Be That Fool For You.

2010-04-01T15:56:00.003+08:00

God, I totally forgot today was April Fool's day. Since wednesday was my full day, Thursday's classes started abit late which was at 10.30. So like I managed to get some extra sleep time, but that din really turn out well.

I overslept, and woke up at 10 due to my screaming mother on the phone. That was kinda like the last straw for me. My mom's been screaming at me every single day this past few weeks especially early in the morning. I mean, thats not a very productive way to start a day right? Its not like I woke up late on purpose, because I'm the one whose screwed. Rushing to UiTM, driving like a crazy person and fighting for a carpark.

LIKE WTF WEH. The UiTM Guards are really being a pain in the ass. I've gotten two parking tickets already for not having a uitm sticker, and parking in staff zones. PFSHT. I hate the fact that there's a massive clearing next to the law fac, just a plain field with some big trees and its also gated! The fact is, why not just level the place, tar it up and make a parking lot for law students? GOD DAMMIT that would make the world an easier place for everyone!

So I arrived in UiTM around 10.27am and rushed to look for a car park. Went to my usual spot, but there was so many cars parked there I had to go all the way up the hill just to park my car and walk down for another 5 minutes to get to class. Was pretty much out of breath when I entered the lecture hall. Then, my lecturer called my name.

IRFAN!

Yes madam?

Get ready for the test.

Haaa? Its next week right?

No, NOW!

Haa okay okay okay. (starts cursing by now)

IRFAN!

Yes madam?

April Fools!

and the whole class erupted in laughter -__-' Yeah, I got punk'd by my own lecturer. Aiyo. How could I forget today was April Fools? Sigh. God I believe in people too easily. Shit.

These streets have too many names for me.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Wishing Upon A Star.

2010-03-28T23:50:00.002+08:00

For once, I'm gonna write down the things that I really want, but have no financial capacity to actually buy for myself. So I'm just gonna list them down here, wishing to god that they'll drop down from the sky. Why? Because I'll feel so much better after listing it down.

Amirul Irfan's wishlist.

A New Wardrobe; formal and semi formal attires. Why? Because all my tshirts are now statement tees. Not appropriate at times.
Climbing Gear; harness, belay device, chalkbag. Why? Because climbing fees are so damn expensive if I have to rent all the time!
Gadgets; iPod Touch, most probably. Why? I need a portable media device so I could play music in my car.
Money; hows about winning a contest of somesort with 1million bucks grand prize. Why? My allowance got slashed, and I can't do things the way I used to do them in Kuantan. For god sakes, its freaking hard especially with the car!
Guitar; Acoustic guitar perhaps. Selling off my electric guitar for a plug in acoustic. Why? I wanna play like John Mayer. haha.
Car; visor for my windows, power steering would be nice. Why? For one, its freaking hot in the afternoon so I leave my windows slightly open, and when it rains water gets into the car. Side parking is a bitch. Enough said.

Spoiled? You could say that. Is my list justifiable? HELL YEAH!

And I will always love you, baby.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

No Matter What.

2010-03-28T20:54:00.003+08:00

14 months on, The ballad of Amirul and Amirah is still going strong ;) We may have had bumps and scratches along the way my darling, but which couple doesn't right?

The fact of the matter is, we're happy together and that will never change. Our love is stronger than ever, and we proved all the nay-sayers wrong didn't we baby?

and I realize that I'll never be alone in my life now that you're here :) I'm so happy that I found you, because I never expected that we'd end up this way after our first meeting in Jerejak.

I love you like a fat boy loves his chocolate cake ;) kekeke.

oh oh oh, and I love that blue shirt you got me. hehe. YOU SHOULD STOP GETTING ME STUFF! hmf :(

I'll stand by you.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Whats What.

2010-03-23T23:35:00.002+08:00

Its been almost a week since I last posted something up. What happened in that period of time? Well alot for sure. Starting with Friday itself. Class as usual, and drove back home for prayers later on. Followed the boys up to Genting that night.

Oh, boy wasn't that fun. It was sorta like a secret trip cos my parents had no idea thats where I went cos, face it. They ain't never gonna let me go. We went up that misty hill for one purpose only; shisha. Yeah you heard me right. haha.

Tot brought his shisha bong, and we brought all the necessities including a portable stove for the charcoal and all. So yeah, it was fun!

I got to see my baby for a while at oldtown yet again on Sunday :) I'm sorry baby, we'll go out on a date very soon okay? :)

And I had to finish up my assignment which was due yesterday, the night before. So jyeah. Its hard not to procrastinate when you know that eventually, you will. I'm trying to make a change to my ways, but its pretty hard to do so when you're so used to the easy life.

Starting to dislike the huge burden of cases which I have to remember in law. My finals are about this time next month. And I have four law subjects to cover. Am I up to it? Not one bit.

God, give me strength.

half of my heart.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Its Not A Sharp, But A Flat.

2010-03-18T16:21:00.004+08:00

Today marks a new milestone in my life. I have managed to change a flat tyre. Mine, in particular.

Well, one way or another I think karma bit me square in the butt this time. I mean, I sorta skipped my CTU class today(Shh don't tell my parents!) and chilled with my buddies in their room.

Was driving off home. Backing out of the parking space, and heard my right front tyre hubcap falling off. I already had FML running through my head. I thought it just fell off. I exited the car to pick it up and realised my front tyre was flat.

I feared this to be another Kuantan incident. Back in Kuantan I had people fucking up my business all the time. And, my first instinct was another repetition of that same issue. Called my dad and told him what happened, and called Iylia and Naqi who were upstairs to help me out.

I din realize it at first, but 3 other cars infront of me shared the same fate including Iylia's Perdana. So there we were, changing our flat tyres under the scorching hot sun. Funny thing was, that the people inside the house across where we were parking came outside. They were looking at us, and they had this distinct smile on their faces.

It made sense now. Its safe to assume that they were the culprits of such vandal acts. We weren't even blocking the house! It was an empty space, and there was ample space around us. Like wth right? There were so many people who walked passed us while we changed our tyres. And how can nobody see the culprit in the act and stood by and did nothing?

It puzzled me however, how people who were walking by could just watch how our cars were vandalized. I mean, talk about ignorance. Melayu sama melayu pun nak makan daging sendiri ke? See why we Malays are so behind every race in Malaysia? This very attitude. Takboleh tengok orang hidup senang betul la. Busuk betul hati anda.

I feel like dancing wooo!

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

A Watery Weekend.

2010-03-16T10:12:00.003+08:00

I'm starting to feel the pain in the ass of being in lawschool. The huge burden of the statues, and cases to memorize by heart, is overwhelming I must say.

I can't seem to study for my finals too. Finals starts on the 21st of April. I am so screwed. I'm hoping to get some form of loan, or scholarship. First semester is the time i'd fight for it. Do I have the determination to do so? Yes, provided that someone destroys my modem to pieces. HAHA.

Yes. Facebook is the reason why i'm dropping out on my studies. And I have no idea why.

Other than that, I had a terriffic weekend with my darling girlfriend ;) I was her so called "drebar" for the day I guess? hehe. We went to KLCC on a sunday. Not bad of a traffic going there. Coming back was slightly a pain.

Not that it really matters because that just means I get to spend more time with her :) teeheeeeheeee.

Aquaria was funn kan babyy? hehe. The sight of reptiles sends spiders crawling up my spine. Yeah, nothing those slimy creatures can do to you. Learned a bunch of stuff though. There was this small frog which was the most toxic animal on earth! haha. Some aborigines use the poison on their darts to hunt for animals. It wasn't any bigger than 50cent coin.

It was a good day indeed :) I love you baby, forever and ever <3

How long she can go before she burns out.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Footie Crazy.

2010-03-13T13:40:00.002+08:00

Had one of my best nights with my fellow debaters last night! We decided to play futsal for a change. A way of bonding I guess. Maybe we're just trying to prove that debaters can't play futsal cos we're always with books and general knowledge.Teeeheeeeheeee ;)

A lot of us turned out last night actually. There were about 15 of us who played. It was 10 minute intervals between each games. First team to score 2, or the end of 10 minutes, the leading team stays. We changed teammates often though. Since we're all not as physically fit I guess? haha.

Oh god, I had so much fun running around. But stamina took its toll on me. As after the first hour, I wasn't making runs like how Wayne Rooney charged back and forth down the field. Dribbling skills went out the door too. Scored a couple of goals though. One-on-one and a long distance shot. God that was sweet. Had an awesome cross coming in from the left by Taqi, but running and heading isn't one of my strong points. haha.

Amirul Irfan has still got it ladies and gentlemen! haha.

Contrary to popular belief, the fact that I have a car now hasn't really lead to me not being at home at all. Usually thats the common pattern that follows upon having transportation. Not me. I'd be too lazy to go out. The only thing I'd think off when I'm home is to laze around on the couch watching tv.

Plus, the drivers on the road hasn't done a thing to encourage me to join the herd on the roads. Pfft. Taxi drivers especially. You moron's seem to think you own the roads. Cutting into lanes, indecisive, and you freaking hog the road. Pfft. People do it to you, and you'd flip out. Dey, look in the mirror.

Okay I'm gonna massage my aching body now. Toorah! ;)

I wanna be with you night and day.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Smile.

2010-03-08T00:28:00.001+08:00

Teeheeeeheeee ;D

I LOVE YOU :)

I can't fight this feeling anymore.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Losing My Grip.

2010-03-06T11:15:00.004+08:00

I went wallclimbing on thursday. Invited my ever loyal belay partner, Zuriana with me to climb as she hasn't been climbing for quite sometime too.

TIto had a hard time on the highway. I discovered that its hard to push over 110 in a 660cc engine. I might just burn more fuel instead. So I just accepted the limits upon my new Tito, and drove within those parameters. I'm happy to say that I got used to the shifting, and big hills ain't a big deal anymore :D teeheeeeheeee.

Back to climbing issues, I've lost my touch la. I've lost my endurance, my stamina, and I don't have the same solid grip I had 2 weeks ago. Couldn't climb anything over 6a. Sigh. This is bad yo.

I need to get back into shape la. Staying indoors all the time, and going all out in the climbing gym hasn't been working for me.

I injured my forearms, and at one point, my hips hurt too. Had to twist my body at one point to get to a foothold. Oh I really need to go climbing more often now. The long interval ain't good. I could barely climb the ones which I was easy for me before this.

On an entirely different ground, I wonder whether I'm a victim of double standards, or are you just a sucky friend? You seem to have time for everything else, but none for me. Yeah I'm pissed off. Am I too courteous in the situation? I seem to be the fool chasing after the friend. One sided much? I think I try too hard.

God, I feel stupid.

You are my number one.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Cupid's Fucked Up Moral Compass.

2010-03-02T23:53:00.002+08:00

Can you imagine Cupid shooting arrows at people who're already in love?

That'll be a waste of magical love arrows wouldn't it? If Cupid one day decided that he'd screw humanity up by matchmaking people who were already in love with their respective partners, well that'll be fucked up man. Think about it. Two people are happily together, a few bumps along the way, but hey thats the whole nature of a relationship right?

Cupid however, has nothing to lose in the situation. Just for the fun of it, or just because he hears the cries of a party in a situation where couples have their arguments, he wants to put an end to the pain and sorrow, he matchmakes that person with someone else.

Its bad enough that you have to work out the differences in your relationship which is pretty much on the rocks, but now with Cupid randomly matchmaking the love of your life with someone else, gee that seems like an uphill battle doesn't it?

I think people would go after Cupid with torches and rakes if he were to create chaos, just for the fun of it. So the oh so innocent Cupid isn't so innocent after all. He has interior motives and is driven by spite and vengeance. And the worse part of it, he'll do it with a smile on his face as you watch your other half leave.

A word of advice, don't play Cupid to people who don't need it. Ever.

Cupid, you've got your own shit to be worried of. Try shooting yourself in the butt. Pfft. You look lonely all the time. And for gods sake, put some clothes on. You're making a fool of yourself.

The smell of wine and cheap perfume.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan

Personal Preferences.

2010-03-02T00:07:00.004+08:00

What makes a person popular?

Is it the clothes on his back? The family he was born into? The way he looks perhaps? Any combinations of these variables would make a person quote-unquote, popular.

However, is there such a dire need for one to be so ostentatious that you start ridiculing others on why they don't follow suit? Then all the badmouthing starts. You're boring people, thats why you don't hang out with us. Thats why you don't do the things that we do.

Is there truth in the above statement? Not, one, bit.

Preferences would differ people from their likes and dislikes. Some people like enjoy loud surroundings, some might find serenity in quiet coffeehouses. Jazz music playing in the background, the sound of people sipping coffee and their spoons clanking on the cups. Yeah you catch my drift.

It doesn't give you the right to be prejudicial towards other people's preferences though. Allegations of other people being less superior than you is downright, immature.

She said goodbye too many times before.

Cheers,
Amirul Irfan